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I’m Addicted to Babies

Apr01

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I was never a baby person. I never cooed over babies or wanted to squeeze their soft, chunky thighs. In my twenties, I’d see someone with a baby and think to myself, “That baby stroller is in my way” and then I maneuver around it so I could get to my pedicure and a blowout on time.

Sure, I wanted a baby. Someday.  Way into the future. But at that time, I was a lot more interested in flirting with cute guys and having cocktails with friends.

But suddenly some day arrived. I had an infant. And although she was a bit high maintenance with all her crying and feeding, I really dug her. She was gorgeous and amazing and my love for her was beyond anything I could have predicted. I even learned to get a pedicure and a blowout while holding her amazing self.

But I learned something else. Babyhood is fleeting. Suddenly that little peanut turns into a toddler without much warning. The darling baby that stared at you so lovingly begins throwing food and loudly demanding just about everything. And these are kind of unreasonable demands like “find me Elmo slippers” at 2 am. And you start to think – hey this toddler sure is bossy. Maybe it’s time to have another sweet little baby! And so it goes.

My 5th and final baby just turned 10 months old. I was talking to him recently. Honestly, I was doing most of the talking but I could tell we were really connecting. I explained to him that I wasn’t ready for toddlerhood. I adore his babyhood.

But he doesn’t care at all. He just keeps growing and asserting his will.

And suddenly I found myself longing for a baby. Let me recap that for you – even though I have 5 kids and my youngest is 10 months, I am longing for a baby. It’s obviously an addiction. I don’t even want more kids. They do way too much talking. Plus I’m 100 years old and children are expensive.

I’m not the only mom who adores the baby stage. Westchester resident Daryl Woolsey has two kids, ages 5 and 7, but remembers the joy of having an infant. “They are cute and don’t sass. They depend on you 100 percent. You’re their lifeline. And there is nothing like that first smile.”

Connecticut mom Erin Butler is content with her two kids but can easily recall the magic of the first year. “I love how their tiny hands wrap around your finger like they are holding onto dear life. I love how they open their little mouths when you lean in for a kiss.”

But she too, thinks it’s over too soon. “You stumble through the newborn phase and can hardly catch your breath before they are turning one and walking and talking and you look around wondering if you missed it…even though you have the dark circles under your eyes and spit up all over your clothes to confirm you were there the whole time. It’s overwhelming and exhausting, but it’s completely magical.”

I do realize that I’m going to have to let my baby go. I will  have to watch Cash become an irrational toddler who throws himself into a weepy heap when he can’t have chips for dinner. Oh, I  will love him madly but I will miss his baby self.

Thankfully, the details of babyhood becomes a very fuzzy memory. As we get swept into school schedules, homework and big kid problems, we mostly forget about that baby smell, wispy hair and soft chunky thighs.

Oh how I will miss those thighs.

About the author

Kelcey Kintner

http://www.mamabirddiaries.com/
Kelcey Kintner writes the humor blog, The Mama Bird Diaries and co-founded the cheeky advice site, The Mouthy Housewives. This Columbia Journalism School graduate also drives a gold minivan because you can't fit five kids on a Vespa. An award winning journalist, she still secretly longs to be an Olympic ice skater. You can follow her on Twitter @mamabirddiaries.


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12 Responses to “I’m Addicted to Babies”

  1. Ally Apr 01 at 3:02 pm Reply Reply

    My fourth (and last) is six months. I was never sentimental with my other kids, and I can’t believe how much I ache as I watch this little one grow. I got teary when I put her 3-6 month clothes away last week, knowing I will never have a child wear them again. I just want to stop time with her right now (time can keep going with the three year old though). 

  2. Emma Apr 01 at 10:34 pm Reply Reply

    I feel exactly the same way. My third and very possibly last baby turns 6 months old next week. A couple of months ago I was putting the tiny newborn clothes away and then the 3 month clothes and it almost made me cry from the pain of the loss of that tiny, amazing thing that is a newborn. It made me want another.

    Then I remembered I have a just turned four year old, a 2.5 year old and an infant under six months who keep me busy every waking (and some I’d prefer not to be awake for as well) hour.
    I love each and every one of them, but my favorite stage with each so far has been the newborn stage. The soft touch of baby skin, tiny toes and eyes just starting to wake to the outside world. The tiny newborn cry, being the way they survive in this world. It’s magical, and I highly agree, addictive.
    They should make a patch; I don’t know why anyone does drugs, it’s a powerful high.

    • Kelcey Kintner
      Kelcey Kintner Apr 02 at 12:17 am Reply Reply

      They should make a patch! I need a patch. 

    • pam Apr 02 at 8:17 pm Reply Reply

      This! Every word. Totally and completely! My heart aches at the thought of never having another newborn squish to fit into the teeny tiny onesies. I will miss the bright (too) early morning eyes and smile.

  3. My Kids Mom Apr 02 at 9:59 am Reply Reply

    I’ve got to say, I adore the stage my about-to-be-a-teenager is in. I even like his brother who is ten. Each stage is so fun to greet and get to know. Each might be better than the last. But also, each day for work I go to a childcare center which includes babies. And I can borrow a baby anytime I need! Right now I’m in a toddler infatuation stage and I’ve got a cluster of barely-twos who I adore. I can give them back when they stink or fuss but when they want to climb on me and ask for tickles? I’m there.

  4. My Kids Mom Apr 02 at 10:01 am Reply Reply

    … and I have a small bottle of baby shampoo tucked into a drawer so I’ll always remember the smell of my babies. (Because these days they really don’t smell so good!)

  5. Caroline Apr 02 at 1:19 pm Reply Reply

    This!! I had a surprise-3rd-baby who is a total joy but 3 little boys is… tiring… and OBVIOUSLY we are completely done (even got the tubal to prove it!). However, I truly am anxious that it’s all going so fast and I want my little baby forever… actually, not newborn as such, that’s a bit too sleep-deprived for my taste, but this 4-6 month stage where he sleeps well, is enjoying food and is just such a happy pleasure and a joy. And still has the chunky thighs and baby smell. I think we should form a support group!

  6. Amber_S Apr 02 at 2:48 pm Reply Reply

    This is fascinating to me! I’m so curious about all these different perspectives on motherhood. I’ve always loved babies. I’ve worked with kids since I was 16 (I’m now 30), and I have my masters degree in Early Childhood because I’m THAT much interested in all things baby.

    But now I have my own baby who is 10 months old and I did not enjoy the first 7 months nearly as much as I expected to. I really enjoy the stage she’s in now, and I’m really looking forward to getting to know all the future versions of her. But I think I’m done! The idea of having another doesn’t appeal to me at all. It’s so surprising and odd to me. 

  7. Missi Apr 03 at 8:27 pm Reply Reply

    Yes.  Oh yes.  My baby (my first!) is just over six months and I still spend most nights looking back at pictures of her from when she was new. And two months old. And three months old.  I hated being pregnant – so much! – but it only took me a few weeks before I said to my husband, “I think I’m 15% ready for another baby.”

    How crazy is that??

    I love that she sits and eats and leans towards the toy she wants, but I miss the maternity leave days of being holed up on the sofa with a cup of coffee and a gallon of water, nursing and holding my sleeping babe.

  8. Erin Apr 04 at 12:21 am Reply Reply

    Is it strange to get a bit weepy reading my own words?  Sorry I missed your 100th bday :-} 

  9. Susan:) Apr 08 at 2:57 am Reply Reply

    Nope. I don’t miss the infant stage at all. It’s my least favorite!  I was soo happy when the youngest turned one. Even better when she turned two. I’m pretty sure my favorite age is four. Two and three are pretty good, but four is so sweet. Youngest is four and I’m savoring it. I want her to stay like she is for a good long while. But alas, they do keep growing! But yeah, honestly, babies don’t thrill me. Once they can walk and talk and do things for themselves, then I start having fun!

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