“Sleeping Beauty” and Other Games That Let Mommy Snooze
This post is a collective work by The Mouthy Housewives (lucky us!)
Isn’t summer vacation great? School’s over and the kids are home! All day. Every day. Hour after hour. Minute after minute. Second after…okay, you can see where we’re going with this. It’s painful.
What with September and back-to-school being only a few decades away, we’ve been keeping busy by playing lots and lots of fun games with our kids. Lots. All Day. Every day. Hour after…anyway, after a recent round of Duck, Duck, Grey Goose on the Rocks, we paused to read Twitter and saw this bit of genius by @OutnumberedIsMe:
Holy moly, what a game changer!
Because we saw that tweet as a siren song for all of the parents who’ve had it with Twister, Charades and Red Rover. (Question: Why is Rover red? Doesn’t he know we’ve all gone blonde for summer?) And that’s why we’ve come up with a few new games that are fun for kids, but more important, relaxing for parents. Yep, there are no losers in these games, only lots and lots of sleeping/winning!
NEW SUMMER FAMILY GAMES
1. “Sleeping Beauty”: Poor Mommy, she’s fallen under a magic spell and can’t wake up until Daddy comes home at 6 p.m. to kiss her awake. Shhh, kids! Let her sleep or an evil witch will show up! Mwahahahaha!
2. “International Beauty Parlor”: Mommy goes to a beauty parlor in a another land where nobody speaks each others language. The children/spa workers must wash and massage her feet while only communicating in sign language. Do a good job if you want a tip, kids!
3. “We’re Going Camping!”: Build a cushion fort, get sleeping bags and give the kids candy. Tell them that if they come out of the fort, the Hungry Bear will eat the candy. The Hungry Bear then naps on couch. (Note: The Hungry Bear is also now the Cranky Bear because the couch is cushionless.)
4. “Dinosaur!”: Mommy is an extinct dinosaur! Oooh! See her fossilized remains there under her down comforter? You can look from a distance, but remember, just like in a museum, no excavating or you will be sent to Museum Security until dinnertime.
5. “Metamorphosis Fun”: Now Mommy is a caterpillar! Look at her in her Snuggie/cocoon! Sit quietly and watch as she transforms into a beautiful butterfly in about an hour or so. Oh, wait—“The Real Housewives of New Jersey” is on. The metamorphosis is going to take a little while longer. Sorry.
6. “We’re Off To See the Wizard!”: It’s Wizard of Oz time! Your kids are the Munchkins, the cat is the Cowardly Lion and the aluminum foil covered dog is the Tin Man! The yellow road awaits, but first Mommy needs to go shoe shopping for some kicky red sandals. Then possibly pass out in a field of poppies. Uh-oh—here comes the Wicked Witch of the PTA. Quick, kids, spray her with the hose!
7. “The Little Rascals”: Take a trip into nostalgia with this fun game from a more simple time. Let your kids bust into a “junkyard” (aka Daddy’s half of the closet) while Guard Dog mommy sleeps in the corner. Classic hijinks! Afterwards, enjoy a snack of baked beans from the can and a bit of cod liver oil to ward off scurvy.
8. “CSI: Mommy”: Look, kids! There’s a body behind the couch and it’s not moving! Put on your sunglasses, your rubber gloves and start investigating! From the looks of things, the body’s been there a few hours, but you still have to be careful when taking hair samples and dusting the coffee table, night stands and other knick knacks for fingerprints. But careful, this is for older, more responsible children only. Ones who know how to operate a vacuum cleaner and make the wood floors shine.
Happy game playing and remember, summer is for having fun, bonding times with your kids. You just don’t have to be awake for it.
More irreverence can be found over at The Mouthy Housewives website. Go ahead and click on over but first tell us if there are any fun summer family games we should know about.