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Not That Mom

Aug12

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I am a good mother. 

It’s just that I am not that mom.  You know the one.  She seems to make it all look effortless.  She sews and bakes and organizes parties for the class.  Her kids wear clothing that matches.  Her car doesn’t have scratches along the side from bikes and scooters riding too close.  All the other mothers are in awe of her. 

I am happy that mom exists.  Without her my children would not know what to do with a glue stick and felt.  They would never have seen the inside of Chuck-E-Cheese or decorated sugar cookies the size of their faces.  Their classroom at school would not be decorated for monthly theme parties.  It’s just not me.

I’ll let you in on a secret.   I don’t want to be that mom. 

There are a lot of things I don’t do, things that sometimes make me feel like an anomaly in the competitive suburban parenting world.  I am okay with it.  I am okay with opting out of the competition.  I am okay with being selfish sometimes, if it means I am being true to who I am.  If that means I never have to build my own bear, I will survive.  Somehow.

I don’t play. I like to say that this is why I had lots of children, so that I would never have to play a board game, but the truth is that it was just a wonderful perk. 

I don’t scrapbook.  I will not have meticulously crafted baby books filled with photos and stickers documenting my children’s lives.  My oldest son has a baby book that I carefully wrote in for the first few months of his life, during which time I cried that there was not enough room in the book for me to write all of the wonderous things that he did, like blink.  I bought the identical baby book for each subsequent child.  I was determined not to be that parent who slacked off and had nothing but a couple of blurry photos for the later born children in the family.  My kids would all have the same baby book, so help me God.   And they do.

The books all stand neatly in a group in my bookcase.  Six of them are completely blank.

I don’t do crafts.  I don’t get crafts.  I have zero desire to hot glue googly eyes onto anything.
I don’t volunteer in the classroom every week.  I don’t want to be room mother, nor do I want to come and read to the class. In fact, I’d prefer that there were less classroom parties at which my attendance was expected.  Do I really need to come to the school in the middle of the day and watch a bunch of kids eat cupcakes and do a craft? 

I don’t bring my children to indoor playspaces designed solely to separate me from my money. 

I don’t wear holiday themed sweaters or jewelry.  I don’t wear matching clothes with my children.

I don’t sew.  I especially do not sew my children their own Halloween costumes.

I am the mother who decides to ignore the warnings and test the strength of the iron on patch and not sew it to the football jersey.  I am the mother standing on the sidelines with bright green thread and a bent needle sewing the iron on patch to the jersey after it fell off on the walk from the parking lot to the field, while my son impatiently pulls away from me.

I am the mother who also sews the patches on the jerseys of the kids who have slacker parents like me.  The bright green thread against the white jersey is like our secret handshake.

My daughter has joined girl scouts this year.  We missed the first get together– a Mommy and Me scrapbooking event.  I heard that there is a sash and numerous patches that must be sewn onto this sash.  I am pretty sure I am not cut out for this.  I found out that at the next meeting we would be signing up for what special mom we would like to be.  Meaning everyone would pick something in their area of expertise.  There was Crafting Mom, Camping Mom, Cooking Mom, to name a few.  I looked for Cocktail Mom on the list, but no such luck.   

I don’t bake elaborate birthday cakes.  Isn’t that what bakeries are for?  Nor do I plan a huge theme birthday parties and invite the entire class.  In fact, my 9 and 11 yr old sons are celebrating their birthdays next week with three of their good friends.  They are all going to the paintball place where they will try to kill each other, then back to our house for pizza and a sleepover. 

Their birthdays were 9 months and 5 months ago. 

My 5 and 7 year olds want me to plan them a joint birthday party now.  Their birthdays were 8 and 4 months ago.  I figure I still have time.

This is by no means an exhaustive list.    We have two weeks until school begins here and already I am being inundated with things I “have” to do lest my children be deprived by the lack of glitter and parental over-involvement in their lives.  So please make me feel better and tell me, what don’t you do?

About the author

Chris Jordan

http://notesfromthetrenches.com
Chris Jordan began blogging at Notes From the Trenches in 2004 where she writes about her life raising her children in Austin, Texas.

Oh, she has seven of them. Yes, children.

Yes, they are all hers.

No she's not Catholic or Mormon. Though she wouldn’t mind having a sister-wife because holy hell the laundry never stops.

Yes, she finally figured out what causes it. That's why her youngest is almost 6.

Yes, she has a television.

She enjoys referring to herself in the third person.

If you would like to submit a question for Chris to answer publicly, please do so to adviceforparentsoftweens[at]gmail[dot]com.


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101 Responses to “Not That Mom”

  1. Erin Aug 12 at 4:24 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t have kids!

    But I do enjoy reading your articles.

  2. leigh Aug 12 at 4:39 pm Reply Reply

    I’ve been trying to be THAT MOM for 13 years and frankly I’ve been pretty good at it but it has not made me very happy. Plus my children have been set up to have super high expectations. I’m trying now to be me instead of that mom, but old habits die hard. I have managed to give up being the girl scout troop leader.

  3. 50s Housewife Aug 12 at 4:45 pm Reply Reply

    I used to do a lot of these things. When my older kids were small I was PTA president, room mom, VBS director, you name it. I finally realized that the health and well-being of my children does not hinge on whether or not I am participating in every.single. activity. I’m a much happier (and well-rested) mom now and I think the younger kids are turning out jut as well as the older ones. :)

  4. Isabel Kallman
    Isabel Aug 12 at 5:08 pm Reply Reply

    You know, sometimes people think (and are probably right) I’m *that* mom.

    I guess it comes down to what I make my priorities. I love to organize birthday and holiday parties. I probably dedicate too much time on designing a great holiday card. But I do it because I LOVE to do it.

    Scrapbooking? Baking for the class? Nuh-uh. Not a priority for me, for example. One of many examples….

  5. HereWeGoAJen Aug 12 at 5:13 pm Reply Reply

    There’s a fabric glue. That might work on those iron on patches.

    I’m letting my toddler eat chocolate covered trail mix right now, you know, right before dinner. Oh and so far, we haven’t had a birthday party at all. Might not this year either.

  6. Kathleen Aug 12 at 5:36 pm Reply Reply

    Thank you.

  7. Maggie Aug 12 at 6:35 pm Reply Reply

    I was so relieved my kids didn’t want to do scouts – I am not that mom. I’m also not the mom that lovingly kept all their t-shirts from the many sports teams they played on since the age of 4. At the time I asked if they wanted to keep any of them, they told me no…but come high school and nostalgia time…I was told I should have known they would want them.

  8. Katherine M Aug 12 at 7:04 pm Reply Reply

    When the twins were born I was expected to be ‘that’ mom and when I wasn’t the inlaws made sure I knew they were very disappointed. I got over it (finally). The kids are happy and well behaved so apparently I did something right back then.

    As far as school goes – I do not volunteer in the classrooms (because I would have to be in both rooms at the same time because ,well, they are twins!) and I don’t let the kids sell things for the school (or any other organization) because I don’t believe in having kids sell door-to-door for anything! I would rather donate money to the school for whatever project than have my kid race to sell junk at high prices to win a stupid toy that I wouldn’t have let them own on a normal day. I am the PTO Can Day Lady – once a month I stand next to our truck on the blacktop at the school and collect bags of aluminum cans from the cars as parents drop off their children for class. The money goes to the PTO and this one thing I do by myself so I don’t have to feel guilty refusing to volunteer for anything else.

    I used to feel guilty because I wasn’t ‘that’ mom but now that the twins are turning 10 (next month) I can safely say “I’m so over it!” LOL!!

  9. Beth Aug 12 at 7:21 pm Reply Reply

    I have 6 kids and am also “that mom”. I figure that if I have to drive them to a gazillion places for their sports, etc., then I get a free pass. I also heard, from a priest no less, that I have a get-into-heaven-free card because I had more kids than I can count on one hand. I’ll take that pass, thank you very much.

  10. bdogmama Aug 13 at 9:00 am Reply Reply

    I don’t cook! Can’t cook to save my life. I’m challenged just warming up stuff.

    For now, hubby does any of the cooking, and I stick to yogurt, cheese, fruits, veggies, bread, crackers :)

    Do “those moms” really exist anymore or are they really just folklore?

  11. designingmama Aug 13 at 10:40 am Reply Reply

    I make the cakes and costumes for my kids, and I throw the crazy parties. But I WANT to do those things. There are many other “that-mom” jobs I refuse to do. Give me the creative, fun jobs… I’ll be my typical over-the-top graphic designer self with them. But don’t ask me to go to a meeting or volunteer or collect things. I know there are people in my community who think I am “that” mom, but they don’t realize how incredibly selfish I am about picking what I will and won’t do.

  12. Pam Aug 13 at 12:39 pm Reply Reply

    While I do cook and sew, I hate going to sporting events. I disliked sports when I was a kid (and now). I’d much rather be inside (cooking or sewing), taking advantage of the wonderful technology that is air conditioning in Georgia that outside watching 6 year olds try to make whistles out of grass stems instead of playing baseballs.

    Also? I throw away 99% of all arts and crafts that do come home. Of that which is saved, I keep one piece every other year, and give the rest to the grandparents.

  13. Lisa Aug 13 at 12:40 pm Reply Reply

    The best day of my life was when my youngest left elementary school and I was no longer required to go to/help out with the parties. It took me months to sew on those stupid GS patches and then my daughter quit. I had to ask a friend to sew my daughters ballet slipper straps (when they grow out of the little slippers the straps come unsewn! The nerve!) I don’t own a sewing machine. I’ve made two birthday cakes in my 17 years of parenting and do not play dolls. Let’s just say, I could have written this post. So glad I’m not alone!

  14. Brenna Aug 13 at 12:49 pm Reply Reply

    I sew clothes and Halloween costumes. I bake birthday cakes, at least until recently when my kids decided birthday doughnuts are more fun. Which was fine with me. 

    But I hate birthday parties and classroom obligations. My house is a mess and I struggle for the motivation to cook dinner, every. single. night. 

  15. Anne Aug 13 at 12:49 pm Reply Reply

    Badge Magic. Badge Magic is your friend. 

  16. Kathy Aug 13 at 12:52 pm Reply Reply

    I am a Girl Scout & Cub Scout leader and that’s it. I don’t help in the classroom, my kids don’t have baby books & I don’t keep a lot of stuff for nostalgia. I don’t sew on badges – I use Heat ‘n Bond – crazy I know since I am the leader. I am horrible about keeping the house perfectly clean and I am not great at cooking dinner. But, I have a lot of fun with my kids, we have wonderful memories and they are happy, healthy and well adjusted kids.

  17. Nicki Aug 13 at 12:53 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t cook, I have a certain inability to pay that much attention..
    I avoid the school as much as possible unless cornered by a desperate teacher.
    I don’t sew clothes, costumes, but do make quilts for my own sanity.
    I do not kid craft.  Glitter is not my friend.  They can figure it out by themselves.
    I don’t pick out my kids clothes in the morning.  I am not really sure if they match or not.  Frankly, I don’t really care at 7am.
    I don’t iron unless it’s for quilting.
    I don’t put up their clothes or turn them right side out.  How they go in is how they come out.
    I don’t clean their rooms or pick up their clothes.
    I avoid holiday decorations like the plague… except the tree.

    I am ok with this.  

  18. KLG Aug 13 at 12:55 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t get overly involved. I don’t make routine play dates or sign the boys up for 10 activities at once. I make them play with each other (6 & 4 yo). I don’t let them watch tv. I don’t volunteer at school and failed two years in a row at participating in the read-a thon. I also don’t sell candy, candles or light bulbs. I don’t solve all their problems. The sum total of my artistic abilities is coloring in the lines and drawing stick figures. I’d rather pay for their uniforms to be hemmed than struggle doing it myself.
    I am a good mother, I am a good role model. I don’t want to be “that” mom. My friends who are “that” mom are tired and bitter.

  19. AliceM Aug 13 at 1:13 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t sell things. I am not a salesman and neither are my children. I write a check to the PTA and get on with life.

  20. Karen Aug 13 at 1:31 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t go outside with my kids when they play. It’s HOT in GA in the summer and I can see them from the window. They’re good, they stay in our yard and I can sit in the a/c and read thank you very much!

  21. Deb Aug 13 at 1:32 pm Reply Reply

    When my sons started with the sports teams in high school, crew and ski team, I learned pretty quickly, “I’m not cut out to be a sports mom.” Amazingly, my kids insisted they didn’t mind. So many of their friends on the team whose parents were at every event, cooking, selling things, all of it…and most of those kids were not at all thrilled with their presence. I did make a point to go and see them at least once during the season, and I could tell they were pleased. But I didn’t like the cliques of parents that formed and felt like I was back in high school, outside of it all. I am thankful my children accepted it.

    I think we all learn what we can cope with and what we don’t want to cope with in raising our children. That’s what makes us interesting people.

  22. I felt guilty for a long time about not playing on the floor with my kids enough, not doing crafts, etc. and then began to think about moms from generations ago, and the kind of self-sufficient, creative, smart kids they produced. Did they get down on the floor and play with their kids? Of course not. They worked their butts off just keeping the housework under control.

    So, no more Mommy guilt! 

  23. The K Spot Aug 13 at 1:41 pm Reply Reply

    I have found my people! Dear God I could have written this myself! Thank you. I have said all this to my friends who are these perfect human beings and I love them so dearly, but Jesus, God, who has the time to do this goofy stuff all.the.damn.time. and not feel like you’ve been dragged ten miles from the back of a speeding truck? Thank you for this piece….it was perfect!

  24. Heather Aug 13 at 1:44 pm Reply Reply

    No scrap booking, no sewing. I barely clean. But give me something to draw or decorate and I am all over it. 

  25. Christi Aug 13 at 2:09 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t care what other people think about what I don’t do!
    Christi

  26. Ironic Mom Aug 13 at 2:15 pm Reply Reply

    I think I am you. No crafts, no scrapbooking, no plays, no fuss. The first big word my twins learned was “independently.” As in, “Go play independently. Mommy’s reading the paper.”

  27. Nell Aug 13 at 2:46 pm Reply Reply

    Awesome article. I do not craft or scrapbook – I like to read myself and occasionally let the kid plop in front of the TV so I can read. I do cook but it’s just because it’s cheaper! I can really appreciate liking other moms (or in my case grandmas) who can do some of these awesome things with my kid so I’m not ruining her!

  28. Julie Aug 13 at 2:54 pm Reply Reply

    I’m the mom who doesn’t sign up to help out at back-to-school night. I figure since I work at the school, I get a freebie on that one.

    I do manage the soccer team but I don’t go to any games.

    I don’t let them do more than one activity each per season.

    I do make them practice their instruments.

  29. Sara Aug 13 at 2:54 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t clean. Ever. I pay someone to shovel us out of our mess, weekly. She also washes our bedding. I love her.

    I do cook dinner a few nights a week. Otherwise, they are on their own. We call it ‘free for all dinner’; my nine year old makes a mean pancake dinner. I do all of our grocery shopping, but that’s so I can buy all of my favorite junk food and hide it from the kids.

    I go to four school functions a year per child, because the rest of the parents at my kid’s school are uptight and snobby. And the teachers always look at me like, “so you are the mom who fails to notice at times that your children didn’t brush their hair that morning”. The teachers are uptight too. Don’t even get me started on the PTO. Shudder.

    If my older kid is sick, she stays home by herself with a cell phone. I have a challenging job that I love, and I hate missing work to stay with a sick kid. She’s eleven.

    My nine year old reminds me every morning that she needs her ADHD medication. Huh.

    I’ve given up on matching socks, or figuring out whose underwear is whose, it all goes into a big bin on top of the dryer.

    I have no intention of going ‘back to school’ shopping until at least October, because I figure by then, they will need pants that fit them.

    I do not own needle nor thread, or scrap books or arts and crafts supplies.

    My kids are extremely bright, healthy, kind and happy. They feel kinda sorry for some of their friends, because their moms never leave them alone.

  30. Karate Mom Aug 13 at 3:00 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t play very much with my kids. Every once in awhile, we’ll play Clue or Battleship or something like that, but not on a regular basis. I tell them that the reason I had two of them was so that they could entertain each other!
    I also don’t scrapbook. I tried to, I really did! My daughter’s photo book is finished up to when she was 9 months old. She turned 10 this summer. 

  31. hennifer Aug 13 at 3:14 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t do playdates! I’m happy to send my kids on them but I don’t like being responsible for other children. I don’t chair or coordinate any committees or activities but I will volunteer.

  32. Sarah Aug 13 at 3:18 pm Reply Reply

    I feel like we’re at “That Mom Anonymous” Hi, my name is Sarah, and these are the parenting tasks I will not do….
    Play candyland. In fact, I frequently say that I had 4 children so that I would not have to play board games. I do not play with children, mine or anyone else’s.  
    Mid-week laundry. You can pull those socks out of the basket and wear them again or do the laundry yourself.
    Classroom volunteer. I actually don’t like children en masse all that much.
    Slumber parties. See above. Night time is for sleeping, and sleep never happens at slumber parties, for me or the children.

  33. Kathy from NJ Aug 13 at 3:27 pm Reply Reply

    I was never blessed with children but I would never have been the crafty or sewing one – you can buy something called “Stitch Witchery” – it goes between two things that need to be sewn together and turns it into iron-on. But I don’t use an iron so if I have a hem that needs to be shortened plain old scotch or masking tape works.

  34. Pam Aug 13 at 3:45 pm Reply Reply

    I throw away 99% of arts and crafts projects my kids bring home. I also refer to them as “farts and craps”.

  35. Jead Aug 13 at 4:17 pm Reply Reply

    I like to sew my kids Halloween costumes when they let me, but all of my children have scout uniforms that would never pass inspection due to missing or incorrect patches/badges, etc. I would be really happy to be “cocktail mom” since I have repeatedly stated that all those scout meetings would be vastly improved if adult beverages were available.

    I loathed playing with my kids when they were little and didn’t much. They all seem to be pretty independent and that was the goal. I also hated making mommy talk while I was forced to stand outside with my kids when they were small.

    Scrapbooking gives me the willies. All it does is make me feel inferior and guilty. I have 3 kids and 1 partially completed baby book. Barely.

    I have never liked kid crafts. Family Fun magazine makes me cringe.

    I prefer going out to lunch with my smart, funny friends over showing up for another classroom presentation that is both inaudible and so painfully brief as to make one wonder why bother.

    Clearly you are not alone, Chris. I strive to find other moms who think less like “that” mom and more like you and me.

  36. Mama Fly Aug 13 at 4:27 pm Reply Reply

    Are you my long lost sister? I don’t play or do any activity involving a glue gun. I only volunteer for school field trips that are less than half a day long and are indoors. Once a child turns 8 they no longer get a birthday party – just an outing with a couple of friends. I don’t do sleepovers. I don’t make costumes. Birthday cakes are homemade but ugly!

  37. Tina Aug 13 at 4:29 pm Reply Reply

    I actually USED to be THAT mom. I worked very hard at become THAT mom. And I received high compliments from a lot of people. Then came the panic attacks from freaking out because I wasn’t able to do it all. Now? I am SO not that mom. No more room parenting, no more team mom. I’ve got too much going on in my life now where when I do get to spend time with my kids, I want to enjoy it, not spend it making things for their classes or teams or whatever. So in a nutshell, I went from becoming THAT mom to one who, while appreciates THAT mom, is not envious of her AT ALL anymore.

  38. Taysha Aug 13 at 4:30 pm Reply Reply

    I agree with Anne, Badge Magic is your friend. It’s a Boy Scout product, just peel and stick and voila, the badge stays on. Its worked wonders for me, who is definitely not ‘that’ mom, and my Cub Scout and Brownie.

  39. Amber Aug 13 at 4:38 pm Reply Reply

    Thanks so much for that post…I’m not a crafty, perfect, all together mom and I so appreciated what you said. I used to like cooking, before I had two little ones who don’t like most of what I cook. My house never seems to be clean and I don’t take my kids to those expensive play areas either!

  40. Sue (Laundry for Six) Aug 13 at 5:33 pm Reply Reply

    You are my tribe! Here’s my secret for the Girl Scout patches (and pretty much all other sewing)… stapler.

  41. B Aug 13 at 5:38 pm Reply Reply

    I will not be “that mom”…I do not volunteer in the classroom anymore, even though I have all the time in the world to do so. Just can’t. Seeing what doesn’t happen/isn’t taught in that classroom makes me angry, so I can’t go there. I also do not volunteer to go on field trips. I don’t do sleepovers and I don’t entertain other people’s children in my home at other times either. I have thrown ONE friend birthday party in my 20 yrs of being a parent. I will never do it again. I do not sew or do any type of scrapbooking. And why yes, I did buy the cub scout shirt with the patches already sewn on, thank you very much!(don’t know what I’m going to do with the merit badges as he earns them though…maybe ask grandma to sew!?) Oh and also, I do not sign my kids up for 18 activities each. I hate spending time in the car. Totally boring. And lastly, no violin. If my kids want to play in the orchestra, that’s fine…just not the violin. Makes my teeth get goosebumps. Like nails on a chalkboard. My son plays the cello…much easier to listen to.

  42. Marie Aug 13 at 6:16 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t make the Halloween costumes either (that’s what I married a costume designer for).
    When my daughter was in brownies and girl scouts (which she quit, because there was “too much singing”), I cursed the patches that were not iron on.
    I hate scrapping – I’m hiring my niece to do my children’s scrap books. I hate playing any kind of game – board, card and video, I think because I really hate to lose, especially to a five year old.

  43. Adelaide Aime Aug 13 at 7:00 pm Reply Reply

    Hi Chris, Like you, I am happy to NOT be “that Mom”. Bless their hearts.

    But I am a Mom that my kids and their friends like to be around, and want to talk to. I’m the mom who listens as they try to figure out the hard stuff like race relations, politics, romantic partners of either sex
    The Mom who hugged one 12 year old girl whose dog had just died, and her own parents told her to suck it up. The Mom who when an 8 year old visitor peed his pants was able to get him out of the room, get him into dry clothes, clean the chair he was sitting in; all without the other 3 boys noticing. He was thankful for that. The Mom who was comfortable talking a preteen girl through the first time of getting her period.
    Cupcakes, glitter, matched clothing and fancy parties will be long forgotten. But a few well-chosen words of comfort or humor can mean all the world to a scared young person.

  44. Nancy R Aug 13 at 7:37 pm Reply Reply

    Oh, I don’t play either! We’ve had our Wii for almost two years now and I’ve done nothing more than create my Mii. It keeps THEM entertained so I can do my own thing.
    I don’t mind helping in the classroom if it’s helping out the teacher, but I’m not into elaborate crafts either…most kids aren’t either.

    Hey, and the secret to both the iron-on AND the non-iron-on patches? A product called Heat-n-Bond – it makes ANYTHING iron-on, man.

  45. Kristal Aug 13 at 7:41 pm Reply Reply

    I have six kids and I am NOT that mom.
    I am sitting here crying for joy that I have found my soul-sisters.
    (corny:D)

  46. Heather Aug 13 at 7:49 pm Reply Reply

    omg,thank you for this article! it has made my week and started off the weekend just right. whew, i thought i was alone in this way of thinking.

  47. Shannon Aug 13 at 8:01 pm Reply Reply

    I am not THAT mom, and as a teacher, I’ve found I’m not THAT teacher, either. The crafty/talented moms request the other teacher because she IS that teacher. Everything decorated so well, so cutesy, and she takes the time EVERY MONTH to change it all out, different bulletin boards around the room every month and holiday. I put paper up in August and it stays there until May – it’s all I can manage to throw on different border once in awhile. Class parties? LOL .I’m glad I teach an upper elementary age group where, while they want to have a party, they’re content to just stuff their face with cupcakes and soda instead of sitting and gluing a craft with THAT mom leading the show. This is where the kids in the ‘other’ class envy us. They’re going around the hallways on their meticulously planned scavenger hunts, group activities, games, and crafts while we are pounding away pounds and pounds of sugar. :)

  48. Shelley Aug 13 at 8:04 pm Reply Reply

    Chris, you sound a lot like me. One thing I don’t do? Volunteer. There are so many other suckers out there, that you really don’t have to. I also wish there were fewer classroom parties that required my attendence. Last year there was a first grade Mother’s Day tea. Imagine my excitement. Guess how many first-graders like tea? That would be zero. We were supposed to bring two teacups. I don’t have teacups. I got mine at Goodwill for 45 cents each. I also don’t sew. I was lucky enough to have a mom who was an amazing seamstress, and she took care of all our sewing needs. We moved to a different state a year ago, and patches on the Awana vest? My mom would whip them out on her machine. I don’t own a machine. I barely own a needle and thread, and it shows.
    And oh, don’t even get me started with the crafts. No, I don’t want to help you build a boat out of an egg carton, no I don’t want to play Clue Jr., and I most definitely do not want to play any video games, because I suck at them. All I can say is….you are not alone.

  49. Katherine Aug 13 at 8:35 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t scrapbook. I felt terribly guilty about it for a while since ALL my friends did it. And that guilt made me stop taking pictures. Finally figured out that it was better to take pics and have them in a disorganized mess than to have NO shots at all of my children’s childhoods. Am still not good at the photo thing though.

    I don’t iron. When my now 16 yr old son was 4, he came home from a friend’s house and told me about this amazing thing they had that took wrinkles out of clothes–”It’s called an ironer, Mom.” When I explained to him that we also had an ‘ironer,’ he was amazed since he had never seen me use it.

    When my mom visits, she sews on all my daughter’s Girl Scout patches.

    When clothes are ripped and buttons missing, unless it’s an article I love, I donate it to Goodwill. Or make a big pile when my mom visits.

    I don’t play either.

    I don’t wait on my (now-teenage) children. I have tried to teach them how to be self-sufficient. They can cook simple meals and clean up afterwards. They do their own laundry. They pack their own suitcases for camp.

    I will say I was the room mother for many years. I liked meeting their friends and getting to know other parents, so mostly I did that gig for MYSELF because it was a social outlet. (Yes, my life is sad that I would consider being a room parent a social outlet.)

    Mostly, what I do for my children is, as a widow, work full-time to be able to support them. And I’ve decided that has to be enough. No more guilt about the things I don’t do!!

  50. Erin Aug 13 at 8:38 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t do crafts with my kids. I’m not about to go outside to play in the summer, it’s to hot. I don’t play with my kids.I have 2 kids so they can play together. And it’s very likely that I will not volunteer in my daughters classroom. And I’m ok with that.

  51. Sarah Aug 13 at 8:43 pm Reply Reply

    Don’t scrapbook, don’t art or craft, don’t do massively fancy home parties, don’t colour co-ordinate my children’s clothing, although sometimes it just happens by itself! Used to play a lot, am now breaking free. Don’t mind doing the sporting mum thing, because it’s just a massive excuse to stand or sit in one place and chat with friends for a couple hours. Don’t volunteer constantly for school mum helper stuff. Refuse to be “coordinator” of anything for others. And I simply don’t sew or iron. My husband has to. In fact, I currently have a little bowl of buttons that need to be sewn on my and my kids clothing. It’s full and has been for a couple of months.

  52. Lori Hurley Aug 13 at 9:13 pm Reply Reply

    I think sometimes people THINK I’m that mom because I cook elaborate meals, make my own toiletries, and recently started canning. I’m totally NOT that mom. I hate board games. I’m being roped into playing one now and I hate it. I have five kids and you would think they could play together… nope.
    Here’s my not-that-mom secret… I have 23 Brownie patches just waiting to be sewn/ironed onto my only daughter’s Brownie uniform. This year, she is transitioning to Girl Scouts and will have a whole NEW set that will sit in a drawer, staring at me, taunting me about NOT being that mom! How could my only daughter make it through THREE years of Brownies and not have one patch on her uniform. Oh the guilt!!!

  53. SoMo Aug 13 at 9:24 pm Reply Reply

    Hmmm…what I don’t do. Probably too long to list, but I do buy the best birthday cakes and Halloween costumes out there.

  54. Amy Aug 13 at 10:00 pm Reply Reply

    I hate field trips. I either send my husband or make up a reason I can’t go. I hate being in charge of a “group” other people’s kids at paces like museums and planetariums. I really can’t even express in words how much I hate field trips.

    I cook, and sew and bake cool birthday cakes though.

  55. Kristi B Aug 13 at 10:14 pm Reply Reply

    I was that mom and that wife for years. I was uber-room mother, crafter, “yes, her kids swept the halloween costume contests again”, elaborate birthday cake baking, too cute to be believed hairbow making mom. I was also, Village Mayor (it’s a military thing), FRG leader (another military thing), fund raiser extrodinaire, director of the halfway house for single soldiers (my house where I cooked for and generally mothered those who didn’t have anywhere else to go for the holidays). I didn’t realize how unfulfilling this was until I discovered I was pregnant with twins (they would be babies 6 & 7) and found myself hoping that the doctor put me on bedrest! What kind of mother hopes for a pregnancy with complications so that she will have an excuse to step off the hamster wheel of life and rest? Six days after my twins came home from the hospital, my husband deployed to Afghanistan for a year. Breastfeeding twins and caring for the other 5 all by myself forced me to do something I had never been able to do before. Say NO and mean it…not I don’t think I’ll be able to fit that in, or some other excuse, but a forceful, leave no room for doubt NO! I still bake their cakes, but only because I enjoy baking, and I still make halloween costumes, but only if what they want can’t be bought. I’m not ashamed to admit that the night I had the stomach virus and sick twins, that I grabbed a mixing bowl, dumped an entire box of Fruity Pebbles in, added milk and passed out spoons to the 5 oldest. According to them, it is still the “best dinner ever!” I thank God nightly for sending the twins into my life. Not only do I have two precious babies, but they taught me how to slow down and enjoy the now and that has made me a much better mother than I ever was before.

  56. Sharon Aug 13 at 10:20 pm Reply Reply

    I can sew but I usually don’t. I do everything possible to avoid ironing and classroom parties.

  57. Mary W Aug 13 at 10:51 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t do PTA – seriously My patience for kiddie concerts further wanes with each passing year.  I really don’t like having to  beg and pleasd with my child to put his dress shoes on  on a school night  - The first grade concert left me yelling the words. “I swear if you do not put on this nice shirt and your dress shoes if they don’t kill you as you suggest I will.”  I also will not do school fundraiser I don’t need crappy wrapping paper or over priced waxy chocolate, If I’m going to pay THAT much mone for candy it will imported and wonderful not stale.  

    I don’t iron – even Downy wrinkle reducer is my friend,  

    As for girl scouts two words BADGE MAGIC – you will thank me for this.  It’s fabric strength adhesive  designed for scout badges.  My oldest boys are boy scouts and I have yet to sew a patch on in 9 years of scouting.  

  58. Jill Aug 13 at 11:19 pm Reply Reply

    I am so NOT that mom. I was beginning to wonder if I was the only one in the “not that mom” club…! Thanks for writing this!

  59. kris Aug 13 at 11:22 pm Reply Reply

    i don’t play games unless such guilt is laid upon me i feel i must and i don’t clean. i hate cleaning and laundrey too. bad mom all the way around…

  60. Carrie Aug 13 at 11:54 pm Reply Reply

    Everything you said. I have a large family too. The thing is there are about a 1,000 other things that I know we are doing right and you are too. My kids know we love them and the important things get done. They are turning into wonderful human beings that I love dearly and we have created memories that are unique to us. It’s a blast.

  61. Jennifer Aug 14 at 12:33 am Reply Reply

    I don’t iron. Ever. I don’t make birthday cakes. I don’t sort or fold underwear, four girls worth of panties go into one dresser drawer, they know which ones fit.
    I allow my kids to eat way too much candy. I cringe and look the other way as they watch Sponge Bob. We sing along to songs with questionable lyrics in the car, but we do it together. Just like our kids, we Moms all have our moments. None of us are perfect. Even “those” moms.

  62. Cait Aug 14 at 5:38 am Reply Reply

    I do not, under any circumstances, iron.  In fact if clothes look like they may be the sort that I’d have to iron, I don’t buy them.

    Cait :)
    http://www.caitlynnicholas.blogspot.com

  63. Cathy Aug 14 at 8:17 am Reply Reply

    Two words: Badge Magic. 

    It will change your world. For any number, badge, troop number, you take the thing you want to put on fabric, stick it to the Badge Magic, pull the badge off, and stick it to the fabric. Then, here’s the beauty: Throw the sucker in the dryer. Done. Stuck, but good. 

    http://www.badgemagic.com

    You’re welcome

  64. Brigitte Aug 14 at 8:44 am Reply Reply

    Instead of sewing, I frequently use the E-6000 glue (I find it in Wally-World’s crafts section . . my only reason for entering the crafts section). It’s amazing stuff, we even fixed our car’s bumper with it. ;-D

  65. Lari Aug 14 at 9:58 am Reply Reply

    I’m not that mom either. I laugh and tell people that parents are way too involved in things in our little town…

  66. Erica Aug 14 at 10:51 am Reply Reply

    I “iron” my daughters girl scout patches on with my chi, because I don’t know where my iron is hiding.

  67. Iowamom Aug 14 at 11:07 am Reply Reply

    Wonderfully written! I don’t play with my kids but I read to them quite a bit. However, they’re getting older and the youngest is the only one interested now. The older kids love reading on their own–mission accomplished! They can read! :) I do.not.scrapbook. and never ever will. I have a conspiracy theory on that one. Some over-achieving mom came up with that time sucking idea. I was asked the other day if I’ve been saving my son’s t-shirts (he’s 10) so that when he goes to college I can make a quilt out of them. I nearly fell over laughing.

  68. JENinmich Aug 14 at 1:03 pm Reply Reply

    I LOVE those types of mothers but I am NOT crafty. I can’t cut a straight line. I don’t scrapbook (I tried, I just stink at at). I’m not good a decorating. I usually let thos types of mothers make me feel inadequate, but your article gives me a new perspective. And I’m OK!

  69. Cassie Aug 14 at 1:39 pm Reply Reply

    Hot glue those patches on! Very easy and no one can tell:)

  70. susie Aug 14 at 2:23 pm Reply Reply

    So, what you have to do is find your someone like me. I am the best friend of your type of mom. I LOVE that kind of fun stuff that is painful and torturous for you. I am the “aunt” who helps out and gives mom the break. I have attended school events, made special cupcakes for the school bday party, made all kinds of crafty things for the bday party at home, made an Easter Bonnet for the Spring parade etc. I don’t have any kids so it works out great for the both of us. I get to do fun things with her daughter and she doesn’t have to do crafty things that she hates and has no time for. Win, Win for both us!

  71. Jaymee Aug 14 at 2:55 pm Reply Reply

    So what DO you do? It sounds to me like you don’t appreciate being a Mom. You don’t have to do everything by all means, but you should at least do SOMETHING.

    ***********************
    Isabel: Jaymee, I would recommend reading Chris’s personal blog http://www.notesfromthetrenches.com where for the past five to six years she has been chronicling her life raising her seven kids. Even Gretchen Rubin, author of the NYT #1 best-seller The Happiness Project, has publicly written that she admires what Chris does DO.

  72. Brandi Aug 14 at 4:16 pm Reply Reply

    I am THAT mom. I started the mom’s group. I organize the lunches and the play dates. I do game nights and beach parties and cook-outs. I organize camping trips, road-trips and cruises. I make the cool goodie bags the kids in other classes whine about not getting. I cater and party plan and make take home treats for other people’s parties. And I do it all because *I* enjoy it.
    I don’t clean. I don’t sew. I do laundry when there’s nothing clean to wear. I don’t sit on the sidelines and chat with other moms. I’d rather be playing or hanging out with the guys. I can throw a mean spiral (football), and an 85MPH fast ball. I have been known to sink 20 three pointers in a row, and can put a tennis ball or volleyball almost anywhere on the court. I don’t do dresses, especially formals. I hate the Opera, the Symphony, and reading the classics. I rarely like museums or historical things other than architecture. I don’t think there is anything worse than afternoon tea. I refuse to be volunteered. I do the things I want to do and enjoy. The rest I figure is someone else’s cup of tea. More power to them.

  73. Monica S Aug 14 at 4:41 pm Reply Reply

    What your suppose to go to the kids school parties and send goodies! I always forget to send candy or goody bags to the holiday parties at school. I don’t volunteer cause I have babies at home to take care of. I play board games and such once in a while and am not good at sewing, crafting etc. I DO love my kids whole heartedly and they know it. They are happy and well adjusted so even if I don’t do all the extra stuff I Do the important stuff. :)

  74. April Aug 14 at 6:24 pm Reply Reply

    Hot glue works on badges as long as you never wash the sash – but I would never do that anyway. I must find this badge magic i am reading about sounds fab.

  75. JBlank Aug 14 at 10:00 pm Reply Reply

    Thank you! If you want to be THAT mom -okay. If you don’t want to be THAT mom-okay. I have to be the best me that I can be. You have to be the best you that you can be. We teach our kids to do their best. THAT is how this whole world should work together.

  76. Twix Aug 14 at 10:53 pm Reply Reply

    Shhhh…. I don’t do dishes. Hey that’s what having 5 kids are for! Right??! Well I was nice for their 5 birthdays and this past Christmas, we saved and saved, and then got them a dishwasher. Oh you should have heard the exstatic cries of happiness. Oh and I rarely cook too. Well since they all got old enough to learn and take over, at the ripe age of 10. But when I do cook, I cook good! Same for the laundry they take care of their own. What I do try to do is be there for them. I play with them and I try to keep the doors of communication wide open. Sadly I think I will have to hire help when they all finally leave home ….. heh.

  77. Joy H Aug 14 at 11:25 pm Reply Reply

    I think you are a fantastic mom and I strive to be more like YOU, Chris. I’m learning to say ‘NO’ to school commitments and beyond and it feels good,
    (although I do scrapbook)

  78. Marina Aug 15 at 12:21 am Reply Reply

    My son came home from a playdate and asked why it was that his friend’s house was so much bigger than ours, that they have a pool, a big TV, lots of computers etc. Basically, way more money and stuff than we have. As I was taking a deep breath and thinking fast, he added “AND his mother makes cakes!!!!” I was actually quite pleased that the cakes were the most important thing and offered to get him the ingredients  and help him if he wanted to make a cake. I can’t, and I mean can’t, bake. I can live with that.

  79. Joanne Aug 15 at 1:44 am Reply Reply

    Okay, I totally am into baking great cakes and throwing theme parties.  That’s to make up for everything else that I DON’T do, like play games, clean, volunteer at school, sew, etc., etc.  Honestly, I’d probably do a little more school stuff if I could, but I’m a full-time dental student, so it’s pretty much round-the-clock school for ME.  Any spare time is definitely NOT for volunteering.  It’s for cooking meals, bedtime stories, bath time, and exercise.  A girl’s gotta have priorities!

  80. Ruth Aug 15 at 3:48 am Reply Reply

    I don’t dust, and I don’t vaccum. We have two indoor / outdoor dogs and a new baby. If I dust or vaccum today, I’ll just have to do it again tomorrow, so what is the point of doing it today?

  81. Kerrie Aug 15 at 9:05 am Reply Reply

    “Cocktail Mom…” – I so want to meet her, she’s my hero and role model, someone to look up and aspire to.

    I thought I was the only one whose daughter had her birthday celebration closer to her next birthday than her last one…I am in good company it seems.

    Thanks for the laughs Chris, I love your refreshing take on Motherhood and your ability to be self-deprecating…you make so many parents feel so very normal.

  82. Christie Aug 15 at 11:05 am Reply Reply

    I don’t volunteer to help in my kids’ classrooms, but being a teacher myself it makes it difficult. I wouldn’t do it anyway. I like my own personal time. I don’t play with my kids, there are 5 of them and they love to play together. I hate cooking, but live baking. My husband cooks if he’s home. If not, I make whatever is easiest. But I do bake for my kids’ classrooms if I have the time. I am a soccer mom and will go to every single game if possible. I love talking to the other parents while at the games. A social outlet, so to speak. I do not sew or iron. I do not make Halloween costumes. I clean only because I’m embarrassed by the mess when other people walk in my house. But my kids clean as much as I do. I DO talk to my kids and they are turning out to be very well adjusted happy people. I love being a mom. I don’t love being an overtired, over planned extremely busy mom. Sports keep me running around enough. Thanks for your post. Apparently there are a lot of us out there – we are just too afraid to admit it!

  83. Kirsten Aug 15 at 2:54 pm Reply Reply

    FYI– A nice stapler works wonders for adhering patches to the Girl Scout sash… shhhh… don’t tell :)

  84. Kate M Aug 15 at 7:25 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t scrapbook or love attending classroom parties.  As a regular volunteer at my kids’ school, our church and community, though, I’m really dismayed by the people who say they don’t volunteer at all.  Because there are plenty of other “suckers”?  Really?  I hate feeling like if the few families I know who volunteer didn’t volunteer for everything, nothing would get done.  There’d be no money for computers at the school, no cub scout or girl scout troops, no after school activities offered, no VBS, etc.

  85. Pam Aug 16 at 10:31 am Reply Reply

    Thanks for this. It makes me feel much better. I’m with you! PS: I bought this iron on adhesive that makes all patches iron-on patches. You cut it to the size of the patch, iron it on. Then remove the backing and iron it on to the clothes. It works – it’s the only way I got through Daisies.

  86. elz Aug 16 at 12:11 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t do matching clothes-ick. I don’t do class parties, no scrapbooks, and I don’t sign them up for classes. But, I do sew costumes and plan parties and bake cakes and do crafts. All b/c I have working mom guilt. 100%. It’s crazy, but I feel like if I Martha Stewart their birthdays, then it will make up for me not being there. Completely crazy, I know.

  87. suzie Aug 16 at 2:07 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t cook, I don’t sew, I don’t bake, I don’t do crafts.  I don’t keep endless supplies of things we need – we’re always out of everything. I don’t carry bandaids, antibiotic cream or tissues.  I never have cash.  I don’t teach my kids’ classrooms nifty little things, like how to speak a foreign language, or how to make earrings out of trash.  I don’t ski with my kids.  I don’t play in the parent/kid end-of-season softball/basketball/soccer games.  (Because I suck.)  I begrudgingly throw half-assed birthday parties.

    But I’m a good organizer, and I’m a fun person.  I have fun with my kids, and with their friends.  I teach them that adults know how to laugh, and how to have interesting conversations with non-adults.  I apply my organizational skills to give back to the community that gives much to my kids.  (Meaning, I send lots of emails.)  I go to their sporting events that don’t happen during work hours (and those that do, if they are super-duper important).  I have never missed a performance (and there have been a LOT of them).

    And I married to make up for my creative & cooking skills.  My husband fills in a lot of these gaps.

    Maybe, as a result, my kids roll their eyes at some of the “cutesie” stuff in the world, and I have to work extra-hard to teach them that we must respect everyone.  And maybe they both know whose house (not ours) to go to if they want to be sure that certain snack foods are stocked up in plenty.  But they’re good and well-rounded kids, and I don’t think they’re lacking from my not being “that mom.”

  88. PamS Aug 17 at 2:41 pm Reply Reply

    I don’t sew (though I do sew buttons)
    I don’t sew halloween costumes, make fancy cakes, hold birthday parties in my house for more than 1 additional child.

    I do take photos and I do scrapbook and that is only because I had so many stinking pictures I felt they needed to have something done with them. Besides it is my only hobby. I didn’t play or do crafts when the kids were young and now that they are teenagers, I only play Bocchi, Ladder Ball and Corn Hole. All the rest of my life has been spent providing, reprimanding and loving my kids. There are just some things we aren’t cut out for!

  89. Emily Aug 17 at 3:05 pm Reply Reply

    I am not that mom. I sew. but only for my own enjoyment. i do laundry once a week and dishes every other day. i have a maid that comes in once a week and changes sheets, dusts, cleans the bathroom. all that. i cook. but only because i have to and take every opertunity i have to not do it. i do do the classroom thing. but only because i adore the kids teachers. i hated 90 percent of the infant stage and rejoiced the day the could tell me what they wanted. i still have 30 lbs to loose of baby weight and i do plop my kids on the floor in front of the tv with a pile of toys for an hour of mommy nap time :)

  90. stephanie Aug 18 at 2:17 am Reply Reply

    What a fascinating read! The article was great, but was really grabbed me were all the varied responses. What I find so fasinating is how we as women wish to define ourselves. How lucky we truly are if we feel we have the choice to use our talents in different capacities. We should try less hard to complete with the other moms, and give each other a little more slack. I’m pretty sure we could all use some.

    Oh, and stop that scrapbooking nonsense. Who really gives a damn?

  91. Sarah Aug 18 at 3:59 am Reply Reply

    Not that more than 90 comments is necessary…

    I don’t do laundry. I don’t make breakfast. I rarely do bedtime. My husband does those things – particularly in the summer.

    I am crafty, but I don’t like doing crafts with children. I like baking, but I don’t like having kids underfoot in the kitchen with me.

    I do like reading out loud. I do like playing board/card games occasionally. I like to take my kids to fairs and parks and other special events.

    I love my kids, and I also love myself.

  92. Melissa Aug 18 at 2:21 pm Reply Reply

    I am not and probably never will be “that” mom. I don’t scrapbook. In fact the one I got at my baby shower is still in its wrapper. I sort of managed to notate my daughter’s milestones in her baby book. I’m a decent cook – but I don’t LOVE to do it. My child, at 2.5, isn’t involved in every single toddler activity that there is, and she’d rather play in the dirt than do an organized activity anyhow. I’m ok with that. My MIL is, as we speak, creating pillows out of my daughter’s bumper and hemming her fall clothing. Will I ever pull an art project out of thin air? No, probably not. Can my daughter use dot paints and markers? Yes. She scribbles just fine, thank you very much.

  93. Lisa Aug 18 at 2:38 pm Reply Reply

    How funny! I really can relate to this. I found this by looking for a store that has badge magic that is not twenty minutes away from my workplace. My son has had a badge since February that we have not put on his shirt yet, and he needs it on by tomorrow night for BTS night. And yes, I am the den leader.

  94. k Aug 19 at 11:49 am Reply Reply

    My mom was at my house watching the kids, and decided that she would iron my tablecloth. She dug out the ironing board from the corner of the laundry room, set it up, and plugged in the iron.
    My five year old came in and said, ” What the heck is THAT?

  95. Wendy Aug 20 at 7:09 pm Reply Reply

    A lot of people look at me (and especially my blog) and think that I’m *that* mom because I like to do all those things you listed out: scrapbooks, baking, craft projects and I make my kids bento boxes every single day. But I do them because those are the things that are fun for *me*.

    The things I don’t do:
    - clean the house
    - enroll my kids in sports or classes or activities
    - and I HATE going to the playground more than about anything else in the world.

  96. falwyn Aug 24 at 4:58 pm Reply Reply

    Is anyone actually that mom? Sometimes I think the problem is that I see many individuals who do one or several of these things, but then in my mind the attributes all merge together and become The One Perfect Person. And then I assume that all of them are Perfect Persons. Which is untrue.

    As for me…

    I love to scrapbook … but not to volunteer with classes, kid groups, etc.

    I suck at cleaning and meal planning. I don’t come over and help you clean or organize or move, because I’m more of hindrance than anything. Also because I don’t like it.

    I like to do craft projects occasionally with my kids (especially the less-messy type) .. but I don’t do elaborate parties or decorations, and definitely not fancy cake decorating.

    I like to sew or crochet toys for them … but I never make them clothing or fancy Easter dresses.

    I love to make tree ornaments at Christmas … but I really don’t do holiday parties or much else that requires entertaining.

    I would love to help you (i.e. the generic friend “you”) out with scrapbook or photo related things (including taking photos, or scanning, or other such things). I would rather not cook for you, help you clean, or coupon shop with you. I might babysit for you, if I really like you.

    I guess the key is to know yourself. (Also it’s interesting to see the expectations we put on ourselves.)

  97. brianna Aug 25 at 6:35 pm Reply Reply

    oh my. this blog post couldn’t come at a more perfect time for me.
    no, really.
    last week, my meddling parents let me know that i am not a good mother. i quote “you are not a good mother.” as i quickly lost my friggin mind in protest, they informed me that they came to this conclusion based on 3 key points (it was ever-so-helpful that they had these outlined in advance for me!)
    1: on occassion, my kids eat cereal for dinner (yep. it’s true. when my husband is out of town, and i am feeling completely overwhelmed, we eat a bowl -or two- of cereal for dinner. sue me.)
    2. my children have worn unwashed clothing to school. (yes. i know. horrible. my children wear a uniform to school…and if i’m not on top of the laundry i have been known to grab the least messed up pair of pants from the hamper for round two. somehow this got back to my parents….and somehow this is what i will probably burn in hell for.)
    last but not least, but blaringly obvious as to why i am not a good mother 3. my kids have been tardy to school. a lot. (listen, i’m not a morning person! it’s a 20 minute drive that kicks my @$$ on a daily basis. shoot, my kids are lucky that they get there at all. if i had my way we’d all sleep in until 10am and wear our jammies all day.)

    so, in short, i am not THAT MOTHER either. i never will be. i don’t strive to be. my main goal is to raise healthy, happy, KIND individuals. the rest of that stuff is just minor details. (thankfully i wasn’t raised in the 50′s when mothers ironed pleats into pants…and everything was seen in black and white.)

    doing the best i can,
    bri
    XOXOXOX

  98. Cheryl Aug 30 at 6:12 am Reply Reply

    Oh thank god I am not alone. The only thing that sucks is since we stay away from school, sports events, etc, we don’t get meet each other. We only come across the numerous “those” moms, who I avoid like the plague.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. I want to be “that” mom! « Angi716's Blog - Aug 14

    [...] I want to be “that” mom! I just finished reading a blog about a mother of 7 children who has no interest in being “that” mom.  You know, the one that volunteers in the classroom and joins the PTO.  The one that attends every one of her child’s sporting/dance events and has all the badges sewn on in the proper position on the scouting vests.  The one that scrapbooks and makes crafts and bakes treats for all occassions.  (http://alphamom.com/parenting/not-that-mom/) [...]

  2. at the Fair - Aug 17

    [...] of teary, can I get an Amen on this? I am not a scrapbooker, cannot volunteer during the school day due to work or outside of the [...]

  3. Do You Want Children? | Daree's Insights - Apr 23

    […] 2 years and other traits basically ruined it for any potential siblings :) Plus, I realize that I’m just not “that” kind of mom, and I no longer feel bad about […]

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