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I am returned!

May03

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Howdy ho, Wonderland readers! How I’ve missed you, these past two weeks. While Jenn was bravely churning out excellent commentary, I was busy writing something that has absolutely no relation to actual events at all. It’s the anti-Wonderland, if you will. And that’s all I’m saying about THAT.
Isn’t Jenn something? Let’s give her a hand! She’s also quite fetching. And I’ve seen her in her leisurewear. If you know what I’m saying.
(I’m not sure what I’m saying.)
I am returning to you with a whopping case of The Allergies, of which I am usually not a sufferer, but perhaps the New Jersey pollen/toxic death cloud is especially injurious to my mucous membranes. Anyway, I’m addled. You have been warmed. I mean warned. Although maybe you’ve also been warmed, too; who am I to say?
Also? It’s storming out tonight and a clap of thunder just caused me to hurl myself toward the ceiling. So if anything I write doesn’t make sense or if there’s an entire line of gibberish, that’s why. Because I’m not editing tonight, baby; tonight, I am all about the first draft.
(I’m a liar. I already edited the above paragraph twice.)
On to the news!
I want to talk about this Alec Baldwin thing, but I’m not sure how. This will not stop me from trying.
I’ve heard that those Famous People are just like you and me, and I don’t doubt it. We’re all capable of being driven to nasty, petty behavior (well, most of us, especially me) and I have no wish to deconstruct the infamous voice mail message. I listened to it once, and didn’t feel that I had the right. It’s not like Mr. Baldwin is the first parent to leave a nasty message for his or her child. That’s not excusing him, but it puts him squarely in the realm of humanity—fault-plagued, troubled humanity, but humanity nonetheless. I don’t know what may or may not have driven him to those lengths. Maybe very little did, and he has an anger problem. Maybe he’s a victim, and his ex-wife is a raging harpy. I really couldn’t say.
But then Alec Baldwin went on The View, and that was his choice, so I feel pretty okay talking about it.
The thing is. Here’s the thing. (Oh, my head.) He’s talking about Parental Alienenation Syndrome, and how he’s the victim, hoo dee hoo. But while he’s claiming victim status, he’s also going on the offensive, depicting Ms. Basinger as a shrieking loon who, for instance, wakes her daughter every morning with a litany of rebukes. If even a small percentage of what he says is true, her actions are reprehensible, but by appearing on television to badmouth the mother of his child, he’s engaging in similarly aggressive behavior. And in what way is that good for his child?
(On a lighter note—oh, Barbara Walters makes me laugh. Her discomfort at having to conduct this interview with Rosie O’Donnell is obvious with every twitch of her pursed lips. Each time Alec touches Rosie’s pant leg—which he does with alarming frequency—you can feel her gritting her teeth. Why isn’t he touching my pantleg? I interviewed Anwar Sadat! And I’m wearing a handsome pantsuit. That’s hard to say three times fast! Handsome pantsuit handsome pantsuit pantsome handsuit! A ha ha ha! That would have made Fidel Castro giggle!
Okay, I’m done.)
Back to the whole Parental Alienation issue. The direct victims of PA, as characterized on the Parental Alienation Awareness site, are children. The term has nothing to do with alienated fathers. PA is a form of child abuse. The victimized children are fed lies and manipulated in countless ways by one parent, in order to punish the other. They suffer deeply. And I’m not saying they’re the only victims, that the alienated parents don’t suffer; I can’t imagine the hell of being kept from your children, of watching your children grow to hate you, through no fault of your own. But children suffer lifelong trauma from these sorts of ordeals. The focus of the PAA website is squarely on the suffering child. And I’m saddened that Mr. Baldwin’s isn’t. I’m glad Mr. Baldwin’s outburst/ordeal has shed light on this issue, but now he needs to stop perpetrating the abuse by putting himself in the victim’s role and demonizing his ex-wife. In other words, Alec, it’s time to grow up.
In non-Alec-Baldwin news…
I Love New York: Governor Spitzer protects abortion in NY
Sugar causes CAVITIES?! :Too much sugar putting too many cavities in baby teeth, study says
Why no, I don’t have a problem wth this: Taxing women less: Gender pay equity?

About the author

Alice Bradley

http://www.finslippy.com
Alice Bradley was a regular contributor to Alpha Mom, writing about current events as they related to parenting. You can read about her daily life at her personal blog, Finslippy.


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6 Responses to “I am returned!”

  1. Liza May 03 at 12:16 pm Reply Reply

    I think one of the interesting points, kind of list in the sugar/cavities article, is the impact of not drinking tap water.
    Tap water in most places in the US, has floride added to it so that our teeth are stronger. Bottled water does not. As kids (and adults!) drink less water and are exposed to less floride, our teeth get weaker (or fail to get stronger) and we’re more vulnerable to cavities.
    So go have a drink of water from the tap. :)

  2. Lisa May 04 at 3:00 pm Reply Reply

    I keep reading and hearing about the Alec Baldwin thing, and as yet I haven’t heard anyone mention the fact that he said he made an a## of himself getting to a phone. As if he doesn’t have a cell phone. As if he doesn’t have a personal assistant to dial for him. What a self-absorbed princess he revealed himself to be with that phone call, and sadly his daughter will be the one to suffer for it.

  3. Lisa Milton May 05 at 10:23 am Reply Reply

    Mighty glad to have you back. (Loved Jenn too.) I feel terrible for little Ms. Baldwin – her parents seem to drag her through the mud. Makes me feel aggressive…I want to shake them and tell them to knock it off.
    I haven’t had my coffee today. I will go now.

  4. cagey May 05 at 4:38 pm Reply Reply

    Honestly, I had much sympathy for Alec Baldwin in the whole thing. Yes, the way he spoke to his daughter was horrible. Vile. Inexcusable.
    I still have sympathy because I remember my own dad’s frustration when my mother left him and took my sister and I – my dad had no say, no choice in the matter. However, I didn’t understand the extent of what his heartbreak must have until 19 months ago when I had a child of my own.
    Now, I look at past exchanges with my father, when he would lose his cool over visitation changes in an entirely new light. Furthermore, my parents’ divorce was a supposedly “good” divorce. Yet, it was STILL stressful when my sister and I, per usual, had to be the go-betweens and deliver bad news because my parents rarely spoke to each other. I can only imagine what’s going on with Baldwin/Basinger lines of communication.

  5. RLJ May 05 at 4:57 pm Reply Reply

    Gotta better idea on your tax problem; ditch the joint taxation of married couples in US federal income tax. It’s anarchic and makes it ridiculously expensive for married women to work for pay whilst doing absolutely nothing to support single mothers.

  6. Amy May 08 at 8:52 am Reply Reply

    I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: subsidized, QUALITY childcare will “entice” women into the work force much more effectively. The simple fact is that it’s more expensive for many women to earn a paycheck than it is for them to stay home with their kids.

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