Two Kids, One Bed…For Now

Hi Amy,

I have two girls, ages six and eight. They’ve shared a bedroom their whole lives, and while they have their share of arguing with and teasing each other, they are very close. So much so, in fact, that they have shared a bed ever since we converted the little one’s crib to a toddler bed four years ago.

We do have a bed for each kid, for the record! They just like to talk and sing together before they fall asleep, and when I check on them at night, they’re asleep with their arms around each other. It’s ridiculously sweet, except when someone has a 3 a.m. accident, but that’s another story.

The issue now is that they are getting pretty squished into one twin bed, and the second bed, which has barely been slept in, is a toddler bed that’s about to be too small for my younger daughter. We need a second bed, but I’m reluctant to spend money on another twin bed if it’s going to go unused. A double bed would make more sense at the moment, but I do not want them to be forced to share a bed…it’s lovely and sweet now, but if/when it becomes uncomfortable or invasive for one or both kids, I want them to have the option of more space and privacy.

We do have a budget for essential furniture upgrades, but I can’t say money is no object, and in an old house with tiny rooms and low ceilings, space is limited. Thoughts? Have you had any experience with a double bed for two kids?

Cheers,
Probably Overthinking This, Maybe I Should Just Get Two Large Dog Beds

What about a double bed with a pull-out/roll-away twin trundle underneath? Or a twin-over-full bunk bed? You mention low ceilings, but with a little hunting (or a handy woodworking friend) you could probably find something that could work — I’m thinking a low platform-style double bed on the bottom and a not-full-sized loft frame over that with a twin mattress. Either option would let them continue to bed-share for now but give one of them the option of a separate space down the line.

My younger two boys (9 and almost 7) share a room and a double bed, even though the idea when we first moved in was for everyone to have separate rooms. They’d shared a room in our old house with a second-hand twin-over-full bunkbed we’d found on Craigslist. We split the beds up in the new house, but our youngest never really liked being alone at night. He had bad dreams a lot and kept sneaking into his brother’s room to sleep on the floor or the foot of his bed. Special weekend “sleepovers” (since we were initially concerned about them keeping each other up all night) eventually turned into a full-time arrangement, and they’ve been snuggled up comfortably in the bottom double bed ever since.

We DO have plans, however, to put the twin top bed bunk back on. Eventually. We lost the hardware in the move and haven’t tracked down replacements yet since no one is complaining. (My oldest is currently sleeping on the old top bunk in another room, but only until we replace the mattress on HIS bed [a twin bunk with a desk underneath] because one of our cats peed on it. That’s a whole other story. OMFG. ) But I agree with you that the bed-sharing thing WILL come to a natural end at some point and one (or both) will prefer having a more private place to sleep. Who knows, they might decide to be done with bed-sharing AND room-sharing at the same time.

So go ahead and get them a double, but look into configurations that would let you add a twin bed back in without taking up too much space — either go super-low to the ground to allow for a bunk/loft or get a bed frame that’s high enough to accommodate a roll-out. Note that a roll-out will require them to keep their room SUPER tidy and free of floor clutter (which might not be a bad thing). An upper bunk is probably better from a future privacy perspective (but can lead daredevil antics in the meantime). But with a little shopping patience and room-setup ingenuity, either option should work and meet your goals of not disturbing the current sibling adorableness…while allowing for them to eventually outgrow it.

My boys fight and whine and bug the HELL out of each other all the livelong day, believe me. But every night I stick my head in their room and see them sound asleep curled up like puppies, hugging and surrounded by all the bedtime stories they read to each other. It’s just so sweet and cozy, and I’m happy to oblige it for as long as they’re both happy with the arrangement. So far, so good!

Photo source: Depositphotos/Andrey_Kuzmin

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