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Bra Wars: Protruding, Clothes-Damaging Underwires

By Amalah

Dear Amalah,
I have a bit of a fashion problem… and who better to ask than you! You are magical! Yes! I scanned through the archives, but I can’t seem to find anyone with this particular issue. Honestly, I’ve never met another human being with the same problem. Here’s the thing.
My bras are destroying my clothes.
I do wear a rather hefty size – 38DDDD, usually, depending on the brand. Admittedly, I have gained a bit of weight over the last couple of years, and the problem was somewhat more limited when the bras were a bit smaller (slightly. When I say “smaller”, I’m still talking 36DDD here.) Basically, there are few to no non-underwire options available in the size I require. There is also **very** little, uhh, space in between Boob A and Boob B. Consequently, the wires tend to protrude in the center. Knit tops and sweaters tend to yank against them. In the car, my seatbelt chafes against the wire and makes a mark on whatever I happen to be wearing. Last but not least, the wires, they poke rather uncomfortably into my boyfriend’s chest. There are now little ugly worn-out spots right in the middle of several shirts where the ends of the wires have been scraping.
Now, before you say “go get a fitting!” let me say – more than one fitting-lady at more than one Nordstrom has told me that this may be an unsolvable problem, but I find that hard to believe. Obviously it’s less of an issue with lower-profile bra styles, but a true triangle-cup or demi-cut is not usually available in the size I need. And I’m becoming slightly obsessed with it… I’ve tried everything in my power to defeat the abrasion from the seatbelt, but nothing seems to work, and I’m tired of ignoring the fact that YES YOU CAN SEE MY BRA WIRES POKING RATHER INDISCREETLY OUT OF THE MIDDLE OF MY CHEST AT ALL TIMES OMG. I tend to fixate on it, examine the center of my shirt in every possible light & mirror I encounter, etc. I think WAYYYYY too much about the best combinations of shirts & bras I have available to minimize the sticky-outy-ness (which rarely succeeds.) It’s difficult to camouflage, as you can imagine.
Any ideas?
Thanks. You’re the best.

Well, THIS one sure did send on a wild Google goose chase and then to a long silent session contemplating the physics of my own underwire bras, trying to envision your problem and possible solutions for it. My personal issue with underwires is their tendency to poke and wear through through the fabric (towards my skin, usually) after awhile, and while Google was able to provide me some ideas for solving this annoyance (sew on a layer of soft fleece fabric over the ends of the underwire), I couldn’t really find anything about underwire bras protruding in the OTHER direction and damaging clothes.
Obviously, this is a fit problem — you are a shape and size that the bra manufacturers just don’t create patterns for. It sounds to me like the underwires are…too long? Or the cup size is too small, so there isn’t enough fabric for the underwires to fully rest under the boob? Your band size is wrong and not keeping the wire in the proper position? I know you’ve had multiple fittings, but…ack! Something is off here.
Have you ever been told by a Nordstrom Lady that one of your measurements needed to be rounded up? (Since bras come in even sizes, odd-numbered measurements tend to get rounded up.) Maybe they rounded up when down would have been better, or they rounded ALL your measurements up and the result is just all wrong. I don’t know. I R FRUSTRATED. (I imagine you are too, probably especially so reading this paragraph, since you explicitly asked that I NOT cop out and tell you to go get a fitting.)
A bra that uses a single, continuous wire across the front may be an improvement, if you can find that, as would buying a near-lifetime supply of any non-underwire bra you manage to come across in your size.
Barring the perfect discovery of the perfect, non-pokey bra, let’s put on our MacGuyver caps for a bit here and think.
For delicate knit tops, could you layer a lycra cami or sports bra underneath (i.e. something that you wouldn’t care about if the wires damaged)? Hopefully the wires aren’t so pointy and sharp that they’d wear through TWO layers of fabric. You could probably just wear any type of lingerie camisole or tank underneath and cut down on the actual damage to your clothes, but something tight and sort-of binding might also help with the visible-wire problem. Sewing a patch of the aforementioned fleece on the front of your bras could prevent further rubbing and wear-and-tear too. And what about something like this for your seat belt?
Another option would be to actually get in there and modify your bras somehow. Remove the underwire completely, figure out how to cut the pokey ends (I’m sure someone at Home Depot would LOVE to help out with this one — you’d need wire cutters, a metal file and then some kind of super-hard enamel or plastic-y paint for the ends), or replace it with a better length/shape of wire or wire alternative (corset boning, maybe? I’m a non-sewer, but perhaps a trip to a sewing store or even the hardware store might spark some inspiration for you).
This site has all kinds of information about sewing your own bras and where you can get all the essential supplies — including replacement underwires. The less-rigidly shaped “demi underwires” might be better suited for you and your…uh…lack of space between the girls. Measure yourself with a bra on and guesstimate on where you’d ideally like the underwire to end and then order that length. Swap out the existing wire and then very thoroughly sew up the empty portion of the underwire channel so the shorter wire stays put.
Thoroughly custom-sewn bras ARE an option, though they certainly wouldn’t be cheap. Check your local phone book or do some local-type Googling to see if you can find an old-school seamstress who makes custom lingerie pieces.

About the Author

Amy Corbett Storch


Amalah is a pseudonym of Amy Corbett Storch. She is the author of the Advice Smackdown and Bounce Back. You can follow Amy’s daily mothering adventures at Ama...

Amalah is a pseudonym of Amy Corbett Storch. She is the author of the Advice Smackdown and Bounce Back. You can follow Amy’s daily mothering adventures at Amalah. Also, it’s pronounced AIM-ah-lah.

If there is a question you would like answered on the Advice Smackdown, please submit it to

Amy also documented her second pregnancy (with Ezra) in our wildly popular Weekly Pregnancy Calendar, Zero to Forty.

Amy is mother to rising first-grader Noah, preschooler Ezra, and toddler Ike.

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  • Kelly J

    July 10, 2008 at 1:16 pm

    There’s a lingerie store in Houston called Top Drawer Lingerie that does amazing fittings and will alter bras as needed for non-traditional sizes. Maybe a place like that would be able to help?

  • Stacitee

    July 10, 2008 at 1:17 pm

    I had a problem similar to this. I never did find a solution that worked for me and ended up with a breast reduction which I’m very happy with. Wish I could suggest a magic solution, but I never found one.

  • kenandbelly

    July 10, 2008 at 1:19 pm

    Okay, this could be total assvice and I apologize for that. But, I’m thinking outloud. How about nursing bras? They come in large sizes and there are LOTS of non-underwire options (underwires can cause mastitis for nursing moms). Some styles have removable underwires and many styles look halfway decent. No one (but you) would know what kind they are.

  • susie

    July 10, 2008 at 1:23 pm

    I’ve had a similar problem with my underwire bras in the past and it’s always a fit problem. Either the bras didn’t fit right when I got them (cup size too small usually) or I gained weight and bras that used to fit no longer fit. I really need an underwire but I hate hate hate it when the wires stick out in front.
    I wouldn’t bother with Nordstrom anymore, you need to get to a specialty bra shop and let those experts help you out. Not only with the fitting but also with actually stocking the right size. It will be expensive, but soooo worth it. Even if you only have two and have to was one out every night, it will be worth it.

  • Suzyn

    July 10, 2008 at 1:25 pm

    Maybe a fitting at a specialty lingerie store instead of a department store? When I was looking for a very specific bra for my wedding, the very large bra dept at Bloomies (in NYC) was hopeless!

  • Laura

    July 10, 2008 at 1:28 pm

    So I’m not the only one who obssesses over this!!!

  • KC

    July 10, 2008 at 1:30 pm

    Have you ever tried shopping online? I know, it seems weird to buy bras online, but I have had similar problems finding bras that fit. (I’m a 38J, which is equvalent to 38DDDDDDD!)
    I found this store to be incredibly helpful. They have a huge selection of underwire AND softcup bras, and I found that they were way cheaper than going to my local specialty store. The bras are pretty (which I had given up on ever having for myself) and they have good sizing information and comments on how the bras fit. Their return policy is also good, though I’ve never had to return any bra to them.

  • Marcy

    July 10, 2008 at 1:33 pm

    Jumping on the breast-reduction bandwagon. It took me a while to reconcile it (ooo…I’ll have scars!) until my plastic surgeon showed me a polaroid of my breasts that he took before I had decided on the surgery (ooo…not so cute, even though they were scar-free I don’t think I realized how droopy and ugly they were). I can assure you that surgeons do their best to leave you proportional and the end result, once the bruising fades, is actually very cute. And here I am 17 years later with a still-perky pair of 34D boobs!

  • Alexa

    July 10, 2008 at 1:38 pm

    I know you said you’ve already be fitted, but I’d go to a specialty bra shop and have them fit you. The bras aren’t cheap but they do wonders. I had been fitted in a Macy’s and Victoria Secrets and they were both off by A LOT. They had fitted me at a 36 D. And after going to fancy place (Zoe & Company, they have shops in Westerly, RI and Concord, NH) Turns out I’m a 32 E or DDD, so I’m a size down from you, but it seems like if it is fitted correctly there shouldn’t be anyway for the wire to poke out. I never knew this before but that triangle between your boobs and the underwires is supposed to lie totally flush against your chest. I’m sorry you’re having this trouble. Best of luck finding a solution.

  • Kati

    July 10, 2008 at 2:06 pm

    I have to agree with Amy that you should try another fitting–if not at Nordstrom, then maybe at a lingerie store? (I go to Nordstrom for mine, though it may be possible that I’ve just gotten lucky.) I have had the same wire problem with some bras (I’m a 36G or 36GG), though I’ve also managed to find some where the wires do lie flat against my body. (Fantasie style 4500, your mileage may vary, but for me this has been the best.) Good luck!

  • AmyM

    July 10, 2008 at 2:09 pm

    Maybe you’ve already tried this, but could you try cutting out the underwires and going without them? (I ask this because it’s what I’ve done when the underwires in my bras have snapped and are stabbing me either in the rib cage or under my arms, but I’m being too cheap to buy new bras.)
    If you decide you absolutely need the underwire, maybe you could cut out the larger ones and replace them with the demi underwires. You’d have to do a little sewing afterward, but no one would see it but you.

  • Lisa M

    July 10, 2008 at 2:22 pm

    I love the nursing bra suggestion! Great creativity.
    I suggest you try Lane Bryant/Cacique bras. They have extra stitching to keep those underwires in place. They’re designed for larger chests, not modified upward. They do have some demi-styles, too. They’re not as cheap as some department stores, but they’re no more expensive than Victoria’s Secret.
    I’m realizing I should buy some more, because they really are VERY comfortable (I’m a 36D, but with nursing I go between 36C and 36DD at different times of day).

  • Isabel

    July 10, 2008 at 2:42 pm

    I wear a lingerie cami under my bra everyday. Yes, it looks a little odd to have my bra over a top. But dude, I have no issues with my underwire bugging my oh, so delicate skin.
    You totally might want to give that one a shot.
    Good luck!

  • LGraves65

    July 10, 2008 at 2:46 pm

    Honey, your band is too big.
    I second/third/fourth the fitting recommendation. However, most department stores suck at it because they follow that “measure around your chest under your bra and add 5” rule. It is bogus. Don’t do it.
    I haven’t checked lately, but I followed the measuring guidelines at and found out I was a 34J. Yeeeah. I ordered some bras in that size (from the UK — Bravissimo) and voila! Wires that sit ON MY BREASTBONE. Cups as big as your head but that COVER MY BOOB. It was a revelation.
    (Then I got a breast reduction and went to a 34D.)

  • LGraves65

    July 10, 2008 at 2:49 pm

    Okay. Dee at (not .com as I had said before) must have taken her site down. I’m sorry.

  • Hope

    July 10, 2008 at 3:01 pm

    I went to a little hole in the wall store in NYC to get fitted a few months ago. The woman basically poked my boobs with her hands, said “wait here” and then came back with the perfect bra. It was pretty impressive, really. It was also a bit like visiting Olivander’s Wands from the Harry Potter books… except for my boobs.
    I’ve been measured at Victoria’s Secret, The Gap, etc and they always get it so horribly wrong. Like, off by several band sizes and a cup size wrong. You should really try a specialty lingerie store. The difference is night and day.
    Plus, once you know what your actual size is, you can order your future bras online for cheap!

  • Christy Henry

    July 10, 2008 at 3:34 pm

    I had this problem for a while, too, and it was a size problem. Try a smaller band and bigger cups! I gained weight with my pregnancies so I just automatically went to bigger bands, but it turns out I didn’t need them. I was trying to wear 38 or 40 DDD and ended up liking 36G! It solved the problem of my center wires scraping my kids when they hugged me.

  • hydrogeek

    July 10, 2008 at 3:44 pm

    Robin at has been going through some major issues trying to solve her bra problem and finally did it by ordering several bras online and just trying them until one fit. Sounds like a specialty store might be the way to go, though, if you don’t want to have to make guesses on the size and ship all the returns back! Good luck.

  • Cassie

    July 10, 2008 at 3:56 pm

    I have to support the fitting suggestions. Nordstrom is usually the only reliable department store but, if they knew they didn’t have anything in your size, they might have tried to find the “equivalent” – because cup size is relative to band size, if you go up a band, you can go down a cup, so 34C is the same as 36B. This works in theory, but not really. But, they might have wanted to avoid telling you that they didn’t carry your size.
    Trousseau in Chicago is fantastic at this. I’d been wearing 36B and found out I was a 32D. World of difference. They’re more likely to have larger/atypical sizes, and be willing to order things for you. Once you know for sure what size you are, order online to save some cash.
    It seems obscene to spend upwards of $60 on a bra, but, oh man, is it a huge improvement.
    Good Luck!

  • jami

    July 10, 2008 at 4:28 pm

    Nordstrom tends to be better than the others, but they’re still not great. I tried on a good 25 bras there last time and gave up.
    I agree with those who say the specialty bra shop is the place to go. My local one even carries bras that are surprisingly reasonable ($35-45) and they just fit SO much better. It’s run by little Russian ladies who basically put each bra on you and then make you “get yourself into it” – so it can be a little mortifying – but the result is worth it!
    (And by the way, I went to buy a bra for my wedding dress years ago – in a different specialty shop particularly for large-chested women – and I was fitted by a women who couldn’t have been a AA on a good day and probably weighed 90 lbs soaking wet. Not who you want to show your big boobs to!)

  • Sarah

    July 10, 2008 at 5:58 pm

    Lane Bryant Microfiber balconette! BEST BRA EVER! I am a 38DDD and this bra I believe would solve all her problems. It’s slightly lower cut in between the boobs but still provides maximun coverage and support. The microfiber material is also stronger than cotton or other materials used in bras and lasts FOREVER! I just bought 4 and I wear them every day!

  • Chive

    July 10, 2008 at 6:06 pm has this to say on the matter:
    Wires standing away at the front of the bra in between your boobs:
    If the wires at the front of the bra in between your boobs stand forward and you can get 2 or 3 fingers underneath, then the cup is too small as your boobs push the wires out. We would advise going up a cup size.
    As they are a specialist company selling bras in size D-K I reckon they probably know what they are talking about.
    In London there are several branches of Rigby & Peller which also has magical scarey women who know your size perfectly without measuring you.

  • Molly

    July 10, 2008 at 7:34 pm

    This used to happen to me, even when I got fitted at two different “specialty” bra shops in DC. Then I saw an Oprah that featured the Intimacy Boutique fitting bras for everyone in the audience and knew I had to go. Luckily we had to go to a wedding in Atlanta and I made my husband stop there on the way to the hotel! I thought I was a 44DDD. Underwires ALWAYS poked out in the middle of my shirts and I never, ever felt comfortable. Guess what…I was actually a 40J. They sold me some bras that were literally a dream come true for me..not too ugly and the most amazing support I’ve ever had. No digging, adjusting, etc. And the wires lie flat against my chest and my boobs are separated like they’re supposed to be! I implore you to try this place if you can!

  • Annie

    July 10, 2008 at 10:05 pm

    S, do not go to a department store to get a bra fitting. Do not. Go to. A department store. I once had a woman at Nordstroms tell me I was too fat to fit any of their bras there. A woman at Victoria’s Secret told me to wear a 40B.
    My bra size is a 34G/34H, depending on the time of the month. In “American” sizes, that’s roughly a 34DDDD/34DDDDD.
    Ugh. So do not go to a department store for bras, ever. Shop only at stores dedicated to lovely underthings. Usually there is some zillion year old woman there who seems sort of daft but can eye your size right off the bat and measures just to double check. (A boob savant, if you will.) A good lingerie store will carry things in European Sizes only, i.e. none of this D/DD/DDD crap where it should say E/F/G.
    As someone with GIANT jugs myself, I recommend Freya bras. I wear push-ups, plunges, and even strapless bras occasionally. My bras never die of anything but old age after a few years. They’re pricey, but totally worth it. I used to have bras riding up my back and underwires poking me half the time and ripping my clothing the other half.
    After you know your size and preferred manufacturer, online shopping is cake. But seriously, get to a bra shop.

  • suziwon

    July 11, 2008 at 12:49 am

    A little more from
    Their plunge bras – seen here:
    go up to a UK H cup size.
    Their balconette bras – seen here:
    go up to a UK K cup size.
    On a personal note, I’m at the larger end of the UK cup range, and have very little space between my boobs as well. For years I suffered from issues similar to yours, with the same reason being given to me…insufficient space between the boobs would make it impossible to get rid of the wires standing away from my chest. Since discovering Bravissimo 9 or so years ago, I no longer have that problem. Even with full cup bras.

  • suziwon

    July 11, 2008 at 12:52 am

    Oh, and Dee didn’t take down her site. She’s now at
    Take a look. She’s quite helpful in establishing a starting point for a bra size, as well as helping to navigate the cup sizes of different manufacturers.

  • April

    July 11, 2008 at 2:26 am

    I have been reading a lot of bra-fitting sites lately and recall that if your underwires are poking out in the front, or not resting between your boobs, it means your cups are too small.
    Knickers Blog is great, and has a lot of tips. Also, surprisingly, Bitch PhD does too.

  • Wallydraigle

    July 11, 2008 at 9:59 am

    I don’t have a large size, just a odd size: 32E. Victoria’s Secret and other places told me for years that I was a 34B. I have no idea where they got that number. I just knew my bras didn’t fit, I was constantly uncomfortable, and my straps were constantly slipped off my shoulders. I will nth the suggestion to go to a specialty shop. Nordstrom’s is a step up from VS, but they still sell bras in the more typical mid-range sizes–sizes which, I’m convinced, most women don’t actually fit into. We’re all forced to buy bras within this tiny spectrum that precious few of us should actually wear. So go to a specialty shop. They’ll measure you (well, maybe; mine doesn’t, as she can guess just by looking because she is MAGIC), throw some bras at you, and THEN if they don’t fit, they’ll play around with the size instead of insisting that the tape measure never lies. We’re all built differently. Measurements are just a starting point. A good lingerie or garment shop knows this.

  • Bryna

    July 11, 2008 at 11:11 am

    I’m just going to reiterate the DO. Not. Get. Fitted. At. Department Stores. thing. S, you are not, definitely not, a 38DDDD if there is no space between your boobs. The only time there’s no space between your boobs is when you’re wearing a crazy super-low plungy thing (like the Inferno…gotta love the Inferno). Otherwise, if your bra fits properly there is space between your boobs, and the middle of your bra should sit flat against your chest. At one point, I was in the same boat. I shoved myself into 38DDD and 38DD because, my god, where do you find bigger than that, and I assumed that I was really probably a 36DDDD because how much bigger than DDD can you really get? I’m not THAT disproportionate. Apparently quite a bit bigger, because I was fitted into a 34HH. No shit. (I’ve lost a bit of weight, so now I’m in a GG, but still) I spent the first 22 years of my life constantly readjusting, and still never getting them to stay in the stupid cups. We’ve all see the horrors of the quad-boob. I was, before the fitting, seriously considering a reduction. Screw all that noise. I love my boobs, now that they’re properly supported, and the back issues have mostly gone away. At first, I had some very large, ugly things and I did not care because at least they FIT (the sales lady said they were out of stock in a bunch of stuff in my size)…but then I found and now I have super-pretty bras that are ALSO in my size. Its awesome. They even have sales once in a while.
    S is probably going through the same thing, and she needs to go to a specialty shop. Victoria’s Secret and Nordstrom are full of hacks with tape measures, and they don’t have any idea what they’re talking about. When you go get fitted, the fitter will probably look at you, maybe measure a bit, and bring you a bunch of bras in different sizes. And then she will totally feel you up. Mostly by sticking fingers into the cup or the band to see how much space is there and how it’s fitting. The band will be tighter than you’re used to, but don’t stress. When you have very large breasts, you want the band (and thus your whole torso) supporting them and not your shoulders. You’ll get used to the feel of a tighter band, and it’ll be more comfortable in the long run because you won’t get those stupid shoulder knots.
    I went to Intimacy in downtown Chicago (the people Oprah puts on her show!), and they have stores all over the place. There’s also, obviously, many other similar places. If you can’t find somewhere to get fitted you could try buying a bunch of bras in different sizes from somewhere online…but read a lot about proper fitting first. The bras are going to be expensive, if you get anywhere above the E-cup range you’re looking at a situation where $40 is a good deal. It is worth it. I promise. Because you spent so much on the bra, you need to wash it in cold water in a lingerie bag with mild soap and never ever ever put it in the dryer. Its a pain, but its worth it. Because otherwise the elastic wears out and it doesn’t fit anymore…and no one wants to re-purchase a $70 bra in just 9 months.

  • Meghan

    July 11, 2008 at 11:20 am

    I don’t really have a great tip or suggestion, but reading all of the comments reminded me of when we went to buy my sister’s wedding dress. My other sister and I had maid of honor dresses that were very similar to the wedding dress, and we all ended up with the same corset. The girl fitting me was SURE that I was a 38B, and nothing I could say would change her mind. Not even the 38DD bra that I was wearing and fit me perfectly. She REFUSED to sell me the proper corset, in my size, because she was so sure that she was measuring me correctly. WTF? Good luck in your search, I found my most recent bras at Target (yes, in the maternity section) and they fit me WONDERFULLY. MUCH better than the ill-fitting and twice as expensive bras from VS that I’d been wearing forever. I’m learning a lot from the comments and I think I’m going to have to go to Trousseau (I’m in Chicago) and see what I can find.

  • Jamie AZ

    July 11, 2008 at 2:20 pm

    I, too, have had my share of the wires sticking out in front issues. I have finally found a bra brand (Chantelle) where I don’t have this issue. Getting the right size (34G) also helped (I was wearing a 36DDD-DDDD before). I have been ordering from rather than trying to find anything locally, which has been impossible. Good luck!

  • qwyneth

    July 11, 2008 at 3:16 pm

    Oh good! I’m glad everyone else said what I was going to say: that your bras don’t fit, regardless of what you’ve been told. If the band doesn’t lay flat against your breastbone in between your breasts, your cups are too small (and probably the band is too big). I’ve never trusted the department store ladies, frankly. They always first tell me my cup size is much, much smaller than it really is, and then when they see the bra literally sitting on top of my breasts their eyes bug out and they proceed to just give me a bunch of larger sizes at random until one sort of fits or they run out of larger bras to hand me (at which time whatever fit the best is dubbed “my size”). You need to go to a specialty store and get fitted. Those ladies are awesome, and they KNOW bras. They’ll fit you properly, often just by looking at you, and they’ll tell you how each individual bra fits in comparison to the other bras. I’ve never worn more comfortable bras than the ones I bought from specialty stores. Oh, and the selection is phenomenal.
    If you live in the DC area, try Trousseau, in Vienna. I went there for my bras until I moved north. The owner is flatter than a pancake, but she’s brilliant.
    If you don’t have a specialty store by you, look at the links people offered. Try fitting yourself from there, then order a bunch of bras in different sizes and try them out. It’ll be expensive, but you’ll be returning most of them. Good luck!

  • Marianne

    July 11, 2008 at 3:17 pm

    Yup, you’re wearing the wrong size. Like the other commenters, I recommend a specialty bra shop, preferably one staffed by little old ladies. I found one here in Vancouver (Diane’s on Granville) which is NOT cheap, but the woman helping me took one look at me, brought me out some bras in my proper size, and suddenly my boobs were perky! and separate! and comfortable! And I wasn’t being stabbed by underwire! It was breast miracle. Now I am a 38G – the G is for ginormous.

  • Stephanie

    July 11, 2008 at 4:48 pm

    Several people here have mentioned bravissimo which I just discovered and LOVE. In general, the UK brands seem to do better for us voluptous types. Freya has lots of bras that are cute, sexy and fun — yippee! Fayreform, Fantasie and Felina are also good brands (They also seem to like the letter F). and have OK selections, and are in the US so ship quicker, but bravissimo has the really pretty stuff! There’s also a site that has a good selection, although the shipping seems to be slow becuase they act as a middleman and get them for you from the UK manufacturers.

  • Jennifer

    July 11, 2008 at 5:01 pm

    Okay, I know that people don’t mean to be anything but helpful with the comments. However, let’s not suggest major surgery to someone who is just asking about getting her bras to fit! I realize that people who have had the breast reduction tend to love it, but…I don’t know. It just seems a bit drastic. If she had written in with a complaint about her skirts being too long because she was short, would we offer the advice of leg lengthening surgery (all the rage in China!)? Just saying! Fix the clothes. Love your boobs!

  • lizneust

    July 11, 2008 at 6:17 pm

    I don’t have this problem, but a friend of mine does. If you are in the Boston area, Lady Grace is the place to go. It’s also good for those of us who are wide but FLAT. Don’t laugh, but it is HARD to find a 38 A. Another size that Victoria’s Secret and the rest don’t stock….

  • Jess

    July 12, 2008 at 4:06 pm

    Two websites for people looking for LOTS of options in extended sizes:
    (the best bra site ever, because the reviews are super helpful for listing the specific issues/perks of each brand/style – like zappos but for bras)

  • Katie

    July 14, 2008 at 10:59 am

    I too have suffered with bad bras. Then I went to Intimacy!
    First there was the obligatory bit with the measuring tape. And she said a number, but it was considerably different than the number I had been working from. And then she said a letter or two, and that was not what I had expected either. And she brought me something in that size and when I put it on I was amazed.
    It felt good. It felt like a loving friend, holding a hand out for you to put yours in. It looked like someone had put icing there, or buttercream frosting, or another sweet, smooth type of goodness.
    I sighed. It sighed with me. I smiled. The salesgirl smiled. The Goddess smiled on us, her handmaidens. We all stood there for a moment breathing in the rightness of Creation.
    Then I looked at the price, and sighed again. She brought me something next that cost half as much, and we did it again, that light-breaking-through-clouds thing. She pointed out that if the fit ever changed, the store would alter it for free.
    I bought the bra. And I am out to spread the word. Sisters, go you to the holy place! Let those women help you! Clothe yourself in the righteousness and glory in which your body belongs! You are a daughter of the great Goddess, and she did not put you here to suffer. Go there now.

  • Rachel

    July 14, 2008 at 2:56 pm

    Intimacy. The best store ever. I live in DC but made an entire weekend trip to NYC to visit the place. Having a shirtless bra fitting totally scared me, but it was absolutely professional and not embarassing at all!!
    I thought I was a 36D, and almost starting crying when the lady told me I was a 34F. The crying was NOT out of joy! However,when my stylist brought me a selection of 15 beautiful bras I immediately became okay with it. I always thought once you hit a D cup pretty bras were unavailable, and boy was I wrong.
    Granted, I dropped $400 on five bras, but my girls have never, ever been happier. I am 27 now, and I would give anything to go back in time and visit Intimacy when I was 22.
    Intimacy is constantly expanding other cities, and I lobbied for the DC area next. We’ll see!

  • Jen

    July 14, 2008 at 3:22 pm

    I have ordered from Bravissimo and they are great, but you can get many of the same bras from for less. I highly recommend Fantasie bras- I find that they are more supportive than Freya and have a fuller cup while still avoiding the problems with the wires as long as you are wearing the correct size. And I agree with the other comments that said that many women wear too big of a band size and too small of a cup size.

  • Dell

    April 4, 2009 at 9:55 am

    I also have a bra problem. I don’t have any space between my breasts and can not find a comfortable bra.