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A “No Toys” Baby Shower?

By Amalah

Dear Amy,

After reading basically everything you have ever written for years now, I am so excited finally to have something to ask you!!! You always always always give the best advice! So, it’s another baby shower etiquette question. I am currently pregnant with our first baby, and I have already had offers to host a shower for me. I have read your recent columns about the etiquette issued related to baby showers and registries and gift-giving and all that. So I already know that you have issues with including baby registry information inside the invitation, but as you said yourself it is getting to the point where it is an accepted, even an expected practice. Now I definitely don’t want to give any kind of impression that I EXPECT anyone to give me anything. That is not the case at all! Nevertheless, if my wedding showers were any indication, people are going to give me gifts. And, frankly, as my husband and I are both poor graduate students, I am more than happy and grateful to allow them to do so.

Here’s the issue – my husband and I both feel very strongly about keeping toys to a minimum for the new baby, and the toys that we do have we would like to be made of natural materials as much as possible. I am not much of a stickler about many things, but we have a small house and are notoriously bad house-keepers, and then there’s the environment and blah blah blah, you get the picture. A plethora of noise-making plastic rattles and toys are just not what I am hoping for. I know that I can keep toys off the baby gift registry, but as we all know, people often stray from registries. When talking this over with a friend, she suggested including a note that said something like “no toys please” with the registry information. That sounds like a perfect solution to me, and I know that I personally would not be offended to receive such a note. On the contrary, I am always grateful for information that helps me get someone a gift they actually want. But then again I am not easily offended! I have no desire or intention to give people a negative impression, nor to squash anyone’s fun in gift-giving. My friend also suggested doing themed showers, like a book-only shower, a clothes-only shower, etc. That seems like a good option too, although I hesitate to take away the option for people to get us practical things like baby monitors or bottles.

So, is there some way to respectfully guide people in their gift-giving (beyond just a registry that a lot of people will ignore anyway), or do I just have to take what I get and hope for return receipts?

Thanks SO much!!
A

So…here’s the thing. There are always two answers to these sorts of questions. The By The Book answer, and the…other one. The more laid-back, “go ahead and do what you want and if someone gets offended then pfft on them” answer.

Is putting “no toys, please” on a baby shower invitation the rudest thing ever? HARDLY. For all the reasons you said: gifts are at this point, pretty inevitable, most people appreciate the guidance and really do want to give you something you’ll use and love and not return. And toys at a baby shower are rarely the top choice — I’m thinking back to my showers and am pretty sure I only got two or three small toys. (Though gift cards attached to stuffed animals are popular. I’ve always just donated the teddy bear or whatever to a children’s charity.) Clothes and gear are by far the more commonly-gifted things. You would not quash anyone’s gift-giving joy. (There’s also the point that someone who decides to ignore the registry might also ignore the fine print about toys, too.)

But. The fact remains that putting ANYTHING on a shower invitation that specifically invites or dictates gifts is a technical breach of “by the book” etiquette. Sorry. IT IS. Shower invites are “supposed” to contain the who, the what, the where and the when. Guests then contact the hostess with their RSVP info and IF THEY CHOOSE TO, inquire about the baby gift registry info at that time. That’s the “proper” way to do it.

But nobody does it that way anymore!” I know! And I don’t think it’s a big deal either! The friends who hosted my showers totally put my registry info on the invites and I cringed but nobody cared! I put my first Amazon baby registry on a sidebar ON MY WEBSITE because people wouldn’t stop asking for it and it felt less awkward than responding to emails about it and exactly ONE person kicked up an offended fuss! And I haven’t been asked to host a baby shower in…uh…ever, so I’ve never even personally had to make the invite call! But…you know. You ask me to put on my etiquette cap, I’m going to have to give you the straight etiquette answer.

And now back to the real-world answer: I would not really have a problem seeing “no toys” on a shower invite. (I would have a problem seeing something like “cash gifts only” or “please buy from our registry only,” though, and I’d bet other people would too. A friend of mine was recently invited to a “Money Shower” for a bride, where there would be a “Money Tree” for guests to attach checks and cash to…and simply opted not to attend because GROSS.) I would both understand and admire your noble effort to keep the toys to a minimum, then laugh at your naiveté because OH HONEY. CHRISTMAS AND BIRTHDAYS. GOOD LUCK. But then I would absolutely 100% obey your wishes and happily get you something non-toy related, complete with a receipt regardless of whether I got it off the registry or not.

(If I may insert one little tangent in defense of non-registry gift-givers: We aren’t all willfully determined to deny you your chosen items. We’re likely just moms who have had babies recently and just really, really want to give you the things that worked best for us. The stuff that fell into the “lifesavers” category as opposed to another pack of bibs or onesies. Like, if I see that you didn’t register for a Miracle Blanket but instead went with a pack of cheaper blankets that I KNOW are too small for swaddling, I’m going to buy you a Miracle Blanket. Or the Ergo instead of the Bjorn. Presumptuous and know-it-all-ish? Probably. BUT SRSLY. I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO HAVE A BABY WITHOUT AT LEAST TRYING THE MIRACLE BLANKET. IT’S LIKE GOING TO WAR WITHOUT A HELMET ON.)

Whew. What was I talking about? Right. I think it’s highly, highly unlikely that you will offend anyone too deeply by putting “no toys, please” in fine print somewhere. But we can conduct an informal poll, right here. Readers? What say you about getting shower invites that include caveats about gifts?

********


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Amalah
About the Author

Amy Corbett Storch

Amalah

Amalah is a pseudonym of Amy Corbett Storch. She is the author of the Advice Smackdown and Bounce Back. You can follow Amy’s daily mothering adventures at Ama...

Amalah is a pseudonym of Amy Corbett Storch. She is the author of the Advice Smackdown and Bounce Back. You can follow Amy’s daily mothering adventures at Amalah. Also, it’s pronounced AIM-ah-lah.

If there is a question you would like answered on the Advice Smackdown, please submit it to [email protected].

Amy also documented her second pregnancy (with Ezra) in our wildly popular Weekly Pregnancy Calendar, Zero to Forty.

Amy is mother to rising first-grader Noah, preschooler Ezra, and toddler Ike.

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Comments

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Katie
Guest
Katie

I wouldn’t be offended if I saw no toys. And I agree with Amy, toys are generally the last thing purchased. Most people can’t help but buy all the little clothes.

Heather
Guest
Heather

Personally I don’t see a problem with it at all. Doing a registry in the first place is a big pain in the butt. It started out as fun, but near the end of the 2+ hours I was exhausted and sore. The fact that you’re not putting toys on there, should be an indication of what you want/need. I agree with Amy too that sometimes a person may go off the registry for the simple fact that they know something better that worked for them and that’s perfectly ok. Here’s a question though – for birthdays, holidays and baptism,… Read more »

cari
Guest
cari

I say I’m drooling over the cupcakes in the photo….I think that’s the pregnancy hormones talking.
I’m of the opinion that any verbage in the invite setting gift criteria is rude. Sorry. Admittedly I’m a little Emily Post-y that way thoigh.

Jaymee
Guest
Jaymee

Want to know how many toys I received at my shower? A big fat ZERO!!! I had a registry at two different stores and toys on both of them. People just don’t want to give toys most of the time. I don’t think you will have that big of a problem with people getting you 500 rattles or anything. If you go to Target or Walmart and look at the amount of “toys” they have for newborns, it’s very slim and let’s face it, people always think about the ‘newborn’ baby. They don’t think about the newborn baby turning into… Read more »

Kate
Guest
Kate

I would also not be offended. I don’t think it’s worth stressing about either way though because I’ve never been to a baby shower where there were more than a few toys given (and I’ve been to a lot of baby showers). The five million tiny onesies that your kid will never get a chance to wear are a much bigger issue imho. Like Amy said the toys don’t really come into play as an issue until holidays and birthdays (and then they’re more likely to come with gift receipts and/or from people close to you who know your preferences).

Lisa M
Guest
Lisa M

I have to say that I agree 100%. I think that it’s ok to mention no toys on the invite.
Last time I threw a shower, I didn’t include the registry information, because I think most people automatically look on-line before heading out to a store; but I wouldn’t be offended if someone else did.
And yeah, I’m one of those that doesn’t always stick to the registry, either. I’ll always grab a couple items (like bottles, etc) and then something that I considered essential.

Courts
Guest
Courts

I’m sorry but I don’t think it’s appropriate to put anything about gifts on the shower invites. And I’m 35 weeks pregnant! And I haven’t had my shower yet! AND I have very specific things I want/need for my shower. But still – it’s tacky to put it down on the invitation. I have told my shower hostess about a few things I want in case anyone asks. But otherwise I will accept what I receive graciously. But then maybe we do things a bit differently where I live? For example, we have the shower AFTER the baby is born,… Read more »

Kate
Guest
Kate

I was screaming “NO!” at my computer screen when I saw the question. I definitely fall on the conservative end of the spectrum when it comes to the topic of registries for baby showers, but I would think very, very poorly of a mom-to-be and the shower host if I saw “no toys” on a shower invitation. Sure, if you were a close friend, the thought would be fleeting (but if you were a close friend, I would have already shared my story of avoiding noise-making toys only to find myself in love with our Fisher Price Sit-n-spin Zebra when… Read more »

Kalisa
Guest

I gotta say, if I received an invitation directing me what to give or not give as a gift, I’d be pretty fucking offended. And I’m not completely old fashioned — I’m fine with pointing someone in the direction of a gift registry. But “no toys”? Rude as hell, sorry. I’d probably skip your shower altogether. Unless I was a really close friend. Then I would call you and tell you you’re being rude as hell.

Eli
Guest
Eli

I can’t comment on the shower end of things other than to say that most peole won’t give you toys anyway. But we are on the same page regarding toys in general. We didn’t want a house full of plastic, noisy crap, especially now that there’s an internet full of lovely wooden, green, non-toxic, natural, quiet toys. Even before #1 was born, I was clear about this to all family members, especially my parents-in-law. It worked. We have received exactly one battery-operated, plastic,noisy thing (from a friend) and everything else is lovely. Our house may be full of toys, but… Read more »

Life of a Doctor's Wife
Guest

I am a weirdo in that a) I would appreciate any guidance about what to get while b) thinking about what a breach of etiquette it was to include gift info.
But it’s not like I would think badly of the mommy-to-be (or shower giver) beyond that.
I long for the days when people followed rules of etiquette, but I acknowledge that sometimes you need to flout them for convenience’s sake.
So basically I’m not any help at all.

April
Guest
April

I wouldn’t give a rip. I mean, each family makes their own decisions and why bother getting offended about the ones other people make? If everyone did that, there would be nothing but people who are offended everywhere over nothing. Oh wait, there are. Oy.

Therese
Guest
Therese

I’m a bit of a stickler for the “no registry info/no gift instructions” on the shower invite. I have to agree that even if people don’t use your registry, toys are low on the list of gifts given. I would also add that most stores (Babies R Us, Wal-Mart, Target…) have fairly liberal return/exchange policies. Even if you get toys, just haul it back to the store and exchange for something you do need. I did this with a ton of stuff I recieved at showers that I didn’t want and/or was a duplicate. Lastly, if you’re just really positive… Read more »

Anonymous
Guest
Anonymous

Gotta go with the “no toys” is just rude. Don’t tell people what they can give you. I had 4 showers – I did not have a registry (my mum and MIL are old fashioned and would have been mortified) and still did not get a single toy. People go nuts with toys on the 1st bday, never the shower. Good luck.

kakaty
Guest
kakaty

Eli took my comment. With our first we made it VERY, VERY clear to family and friends that we didn’t want a ton of plastic loud crap as gifts – ever. And now that our daughter is 3 1/2 and I’m due with the 2nd in 12 days, I can say that it worked. We have very few plastic toys.

Danielle
Guest

While I am all for people getting what they really want/need, I am also definitely one of those who hates to see the registry on the invitation even though it has become more acceptable. I personally think it is rude and somewhat ungrateful to tell people how to gift or by the same token, telling the recipient how they are supposed to use a gift. When it comes to gifts, I think both sides need to not try to “control” it.

Liz
Guest

Or, ok, look at it this way: don’t register for toys. Most people will either go off the registry OR get you, as mentioned, whatever lifesaving thing they think you need. The very few who get you toys will mean…that your kids have like, one or two toys. That you didn’t personally have to buy. And trust me. You are going to someway, somehow, end up with toys. This is inevitable and will suck for you until you realize your kid is occupied and happy. So maybe it’s just ok to know for yourself that “hey man, we’re not big… Read more »

heidi
Guest

I wouldn’t even think twice about seeing no toys on the invite. Any more specific and I might be annoyed. And, as a married mother of 4 children I have to say, I’ve never had a registry for anything. I wish I had. Of course, I was the first of my friends to have kids and get married so I didn’t even know what I needed. A registry would have been nice though. And as a guest? I like registries to give me ideas but I don’t always buy from them. That said, the less I know the person the… Read more »

Colleen
Guest
Colleen

Just remember what Amy said, some people will ignore your requests. We asked our families to not give us battery operated toys. And Christmas, a couple relatives deliberately gave our son noisy, flashy battery toys.
Sometimes you just can’t win.

Diana
Guest
Diana

I would leave it off myself. I would personally be kind of annoyed by the note and very few people buy toys for showers anyway. I didn’t register, because we only had about 15 people coming. I gave the hostess a list of things we wanted and told her we did not need any clothes (due to 10 boxes of hand me downs sitting in the garage). 99% of the people attending my baby shower asked her what we wanted when they RSVP’d, and I think only two people gave us either clothes or toys – it was all gear… Read more »

MommiePie
Guest

I don’t think it’s necessary to put “no toy gifts” on the invite, because you probably won’t get any. Maybe just a few stuffed animals or a rattle or two – which you WILL want anyway. You will need something like that.
Besides, if you get something you don’t want, like toys, you can always take them back and exchange them for what you do want or need.

Julie
Guest
Julie

I wouldn’t be offended at “no toys please” on the invitation. I don’t think it is very great etiquette, but I also wouldn’t be offended by it. I would appreciate the guidance it offered (although since I don’t have kids I am a strictly ‘by the registry’ shopper for baby showers anyhow). I WAS offended when a friend listed on her shower invitation “we will accept gift cards from x store, x store, etc.” I’m still not sure if it was just a bad choice of wording or what, but I COULD NOT believe they put it on there. So…don’t… Read more »

Bethany
Guest

I would have no problem seeing “no toys” I’d be more surprised the invite was paper and not electronic. The baby showers I’ve been to (and bridal) have all been evites and because they’re not being thrown by the honoree (technically) I also don’t mind the registry. I do mind it a little in wedding invites even though I understand the usefulness. I’d rather find a link on your website.

Nicole
Guest

So I specifically told everyone that We Really Don’t Need Any Stuffed Animals Because I Kept All of Mine Thankyouverymuch. I still got stuffed animals. Just a couple, but still. People will do what people will do regardless of what you tell them. The donation route works well. Or if there’s a gift receipt, then you can return/exchange it. Although, I suppose this doesn’t answer the question. I’m a pffft On Them If They Don’t Like It That’s Their Problem, but I am an Only Child. I think that the only answer is one to a question you have to… Read more »

Stephanie
Guest
Stephanie

Eh – I don’t like the idea of saying “no toys.” It just seems a little gift grabby. We didn’t register for any toys, and we got very few – a couple rattles, a few toys to attach to the car seat, some stuffed animals, etc. And I was of the mantra my child doesn’t need plastic toys. BUT. She loves her toys. She LOVES her little plastic rattle that is easy to hold onto and grab and shake. The expensive wooden one from Germany or wherever? Not so much.

Stefanie
Guest
Stefanie

I think you should skip the “no toys” on the invite. I’m not bothered by registry info being included–in fact, I find it helpful, but I think telling people what not to buy you is kind of off-putting. Something to consider is that a guest is not going to be deciding between purchasing you a baby monitor or stroller or a $5 rattle. There is just too much of a disparity in price. So, if you get toys, attempt to return them. If you can, take the money and go out and buy yourself a Miracle Blanket, because, Amy, you… Read more »

kia
Guest

I think no toys is a brilliant idea. My husband and I are also prepping for our 1st and have very set ideas about minimal toys and certain guidelines for them. We know that people that really know us understand but we have his midwest relatives that live in a different culture than us that don’t get it (they still don’t get that I didn’t take his name). For them it is a wild card and no matter what we say they will do what they want, we just hope they buy from Target if it is something we don’t… Read more »

Calee
Guest
Calee

I vote leaving the “no toys” bit off the invite and here’s why: I was in the same boat- bad housekeeper, didn’t want plastic, etc. and I knew I didn’t want a bunch of plastic crap around. I had a huge (60 people?) shower after my daughter was born prematurely- so not pregnant but no baby there– and I think I got 2 or 3 toys. And you know what? They were the crinkly jingly cloth kind that hang on the car seat that I would have never thought to buy and the were AWESOME. You know that babies don’t… Read more »

Kalisa
Guest

Yes, Danielle! “UNGRATEFUL” is the word. If you don’t want brightly colored plastic toys littering up your house, I’m sure there are plenty of children in shelters, urban daycare centers or foster programs that would gladly take them off your hands. Showers aren’t meant to be a way for you to amass all the things you need for the next chapter of your life. They’re a way for your friends and family to congratulate you and celebrate the occasion. It’s NICE that they chose to do that with gifts. Telling them what you will and won’t accept is, as Danielle… Read more »

Jess
Guest

I think this is pissing into the wind to be perfectly honest. You may be able to avoid toys for a shower (but really? i’ve been to a lot of showers and there are very rarely any toys..mostly clothes), but you’re never going to be able to keep your child from plastic toys. The most you can hope for is that people will include a gift receipt (you can always lie to them later and tell them you got a duplicate). But bottom line? Don’t turn your nose at people’s generosity. You’re having a baby and your house will explode… Read more »

Jess
Guest

I think this is pissing into the wind to be perfectly honest. You may be able to avoid toys for a shower (but really? i’ve been to a lot of showers and there are very rarely any toys..mostly clothes), but you’re never going to be able to keep your child from plastic toys. The most you can hope for is that people will include a gift receipt (you can always lie to them later and tell them you got a duplicate). But bottom line? Don’t turn your nose at people’s generosity. You’re having a baby and your house will explode… Read more »

DJ
Guest
DJ

Am I the only one whose kid doesn’t care about wooden, all-natural, quiet toys? We didn’t have any plastic toys in our house, only board books and wooden stuff, and the in-laws got him a plastic ring stacker (the one we all played with as kids) and he loves it! I tried to get him to find the wooden stuff amusing and he wouldn’t have it (this was before the ring stacker). I got him the noise-making seahorse based on Amalah’s suggestion and he loves that,too! I think you can control only so much, in other words. My mom didn’t… Read more »

Andrea
Guest
Andrea

Ugh. We had our baby showers last month and I think it completely depends on your audience. At our first shower people generally purchased us items on our registry, or if they didn’t it was clothes- but we did get a couple of cute stuffed animals. However, at our second shower people went crazy with off registry stuff. And yes, we got a bunch of stuff we did not register including multiple bouncy chairs, a ton of duplicates (diaper rash ointment- which we had to return because we’re cloth diapering, a buttload of bibs, way more pacifiers than we need,… Read more »

Janette
Guest
Janette

I would agree with other commenters: don’t bother saying anything because you won’t get many toys anyway. People opt for gear and clothes.

incognito
Guest
incognito

I don’t know, I used to love Miss Manners et al., and would read the Blue Book from cover to cover and then start all over again, so I appreciate that there are commonly understood “rules” and that people rely on them when their natural instinct for kindness doesn’t provide sufficient guidance for socially complex situations. But I feel like it’s gotten to the point where people are offended simply because Emily Post told them to be offended. I think that’s a deep misunderstanding and misapplication of the “rules.” I also thought that the point of showers WAS to shower… Read more »

C
Guest
C

Honestly, I agree with the posters that say it’s rude. Reminds me of the Berkeley mamas that are trying to give their kid an all organice life, only to find the kids LOVES whatever plastic-y stuff he comes into contact with at others’ houses. If you get toys, hopefully people will include a receipt, and you can return them. But I think I got maybe 1 or 2 toys max at our shower . . .

Della
Guest
Della

Gotta disagree to a point, Kalisa. Showers are a way for family and friends to SHOWER with you with items that you will need for the next chapter in your life. Do some people have a problem with entitlement (these people ought to buy me all the things i need)? Yes. If someone is giving a gift, do they typically do so with the intent that the gift be useful? I think that most gift givers would rather have the recipient take the gift back to the store and get what they want, than to donate the gift to charity.… Read more »

The Other Amy
Guest
The Other Amy

YAY! Thanks for answering my question, oh wise Amalah! Wow, some of your readers feel strongly about no guidance on gifts! While I cannot understand their feelings at all, it is precisely these sorts of people I am worried about offending. So I guess I better just leave well enough alone. One reason I even brought this up is that I always agonize about what to do with a gift you really don’t want or can’t use. I have in the past hurt people’s feelings by returning a gift that they gave me and then getting “caught” when they asked… Read more »

The Other Amy
Guest
The Other Amy

P.S. Incognito’s comment must have been in moderation while I was writing my previous comment. I just want to ditto everything s/he said. Thanks. 🙂

Becky
Guest

I had three baby showers (two sides of family, plus local friends), and when people went off-registry, they got either books or clothes. The loads of toys show up at birthdays and holidays when the babies are a bit older. In those cases, if you have family members who specifically ask you what you want or need, you can tell them your preferences. If not, you can return or donate what you don’t want. (Or store it, and cycle toys out so that your kids have new things, but not a billion toys at once.) On the subject of registries,… Read more »

Lisa
Guest
Lisa

I think most posters are right-on about getting few toys at baby showers. Most people focus on baby care and gear, not toys. I got no toys at my shower, except for some stuffed animals. So if you’re worried about offending folks, just leave off the wording and deal with the small pool of toys you *might* end up getting. Of course, you know your guest list best. But as to the bigger issue of toys in general, I thought I’d share my experience. I inherited from my sister (who has great taste and better shoes) a big huge plastic… Read more »

KittyMarie
Guest

I am a little bit Miss Manners and cringe at the idea of including registry information with invitations in general. But THEN I go right ahead and allow it to be included with the invitations my ladies created for my bridal shower and also included the information with two subsequent showers I put on. I cringed but got over it. People are just too busy nowadays for pleasantries like telephoning the woman’s mother and asking where she’s registered. I am all about streamlining and easy access to information (cringing aside).

KateP
Guest
KateP

What if you were to put the type of toys that you would like to receive on your registry? That might give people an idea of what to look for, but Amy is right, people don’t usually buy toys for baby showers.

Julie
Guest
Julie

Skip the no toys line. And register for a toy or two that you would fine acceptable so that folks know what you’d prefer if they want to go down that path. And…the dirty secret is that most babies love the garish and the loud and sometimes that’s just fine with everyone. One of my kids has some substantial gross motor delays. I buy the loudest, brightest colored toys…becuase he loves them and is motivated to do whatever he has to to play with them. Even if it is really tough for the little guy. (Fisher Price microphone thingy…I am… Read more »

CS
Guest
CS

I’m with the etiquette sticklers. Where I come from, including gift information of any kind on an invitation is rude. Your hostess can steer those who ask towards a gift that will please you.

Angela
Guest

I don’t think you’ll have much to worry about whether you put ‘no toys’ on there or not actually. People go nuts over baby stuff when they walk in the store and often don’t get you anything off the registry anyway. For our first we did the registry and purposely selected a few toys that we’d researched on there. No go. I don’t think we got even one. I think the only people who bought anything off our list either bought books we’d picked (work colleague) or big things like the travel system. Thank goodness they followed the registry on… Read more »

Jamie
Guest
Jamie

you should create a baby registry at http://www.depositagift.com it’s a cash gift registry. so people can contribute to wards the gifts you want, but you’ll receive the gift money and can shop as you like. we’re using it. it’s the perfect solution to not getting too much stuff in the beginning and being able to buy the kinds of things you’d actually use. plus you can register for experience stuff, like swim lessons and babysitters, which is much more practical. it works for showers b/c guests can print a gift certificate at checkout. i’ve already seen a friend do it… Read more »

AJ
Guest
AJ

I personally would be offended. And depending on the relationship the closer you were to me the noisier the toy I would get you (with receipt). But I have never purchased a toy as a shower gift, so my feeling is that you are worrying needlessly. I save toy gifts until the child is actually able to appreciate them (and has formed toy opinions 🙂 )

wallydraigle
Guest

I personally would not be offended. I have a baby and a toddler, and they have a thousand doting relatives. Oh my gosh, the toys. EVERYWHERE. And we have a house, not an apartment. So I get it. Pre-baby, I probably still wouldn’t have been offended, but I don’t know. Enough about me, though. I know a LOT of people who would find this offensive. They’re mostly of the slightly older generations (say, 40 and up), but there are still plenty of them in my own age bracket (25-35ish). Unless you really know the people who would be invited, I… Read more »

lindswing
Guest

Would I be offended? Not a chance. Would I think it was kind of tacky and then forget about it? Yep. I also had a million showers (ok, four) and got zero toys. Some nice books and clothes and a baby swing and mostly things on my registry? Yep. Toys (including the adorable natural ones on my registry)? None. I would suggest not putting the exception on the invite and then if someone buys you a toy either return it or donate it. Almost everything is returnable, don’t forget. And if someone asks your hosting friend for suggestions, she can… Read more »