How to Interview a Teenaged Babysitter

By Brian of Looky, Daddy!

1. Get References.

This one should really read, Get References and Actually Call Them. References are like rebates: They only work if you do something with them.

2. Don’t Ask Questions We All Know the Answers To.

Do not ask “Do you talk on the phone a lot?” or “Do you have people over while you babysit?” Even the dullest of candidates knows the answer is “No.” Instead, ask, “Who do you usually talk with on the phone when you babysit?” or “Tell me about a person who might visit you while you are here.”

3. Establish a Rate Before the Job.

Teenaged babysitters fall into two categories: Extortionists and I-Can’t-Believe-Someone-Is-Paying-Me-ists. Believe it or not, the former is easier to work with. The latter almost always says, “Oh, pay me whatever. You decide,” which just adds an extra bit of stress to coming home after a night out.

4. Ask About Food and Pet Allergies.

Nothing spoils a night out more than a sitter with hives.

5. Seal the Deal.

If you feel like you’ve found the perfect person, lie. Lie to everyone. Lie to the babysitter and tell her your kids are angels. Lie to yourself that now you’ll go out more be happy, er, happier. And if your babysitter does turn out to be great, lie to your friends when they ask about her. Good babysitters are worth their weight in gold.